Match Preview: The Unnatural Disaster Derby

TORONTO FC VS. SAN JOSE EARTHQUAKES
BMO Field - Saturday, 4PM EST
TV: CBC - RADIO: The Fan 590

If Charlton Heston was still alive he would be the perfect guest referee for this match. Hollywood's greatest crisis character actor would do well to preside over two clubs who have been an ongoing train wreck/ plane crash/ natural disaster all season. He could hold red cards aloft in "his cold dead hands!" Both of these clubs have hit way below their pre-season aims and as the season reaches its zenith, neither can afford more bad news. Toronto supporters can take some solace from its recent off-the-pitch good news, namely De Guzman and real grass, as opposed to San Jose who have yet to make a real plan to move out of their glorified high school stadium - Buck Shaw. However, if TFC doesn't get a win on Saturday and misses the playoffs, their on-the-pitch results won't be too different than the Californians. In MLS, if you don't make the playoffs, does it matter if you come in 9th or 15th?

TORONTO FC - 9-8-10 35pts -5th in EAST (10th OVERALL)
The disaster story took a turn for the worst this week as TFC was nailed with a major late-season injury crisis. The two week break was supposed to do wonders for the club's health but suddenly Carl Robinson's face was smashed by a young Cote D'Ivoirian, Marvell Wynne pulled up lame and Stefan Frei dislocated his finger. Robbo is gone for the season and Wynne is most likely out for Saturday while Frei will be a game day decision. Add to the mixture Amado Guevara's international absence and you suddenly have a line-up mish-mash at the most crucial point of the season. Julian De Guzman will have to step it up in the holding midfield role as the Designated Afro makes his home debut with big expectations from the faithful. High hopes will be placed on any new found chemistry between De Gu and De Ro and how that affects the so-called strike force. If Toronto can grab a lead they will have to show the backbone to hold it for 90 minutes and not let in yet another league-worst late 2nd half goal. If TFC doesn't leave with 3 points you may see that classic disaster movie moment when Chris Cummins drops to his knees and yells to the sky "NOOOOOOOO!!!!" ... especially if it's raining.

SJ EARTHQUAKES - 7-7-12 28pts -8th in WEST (14th OVERALL)
Late last season Frank Yallop and his San Jose squad really looked like it had gelled and that the future was bright. Many expected them to challenge for a playoff spot this season but it never got off the ground for the Ghosts of George Best. Very inconsistent play and some roster re-shuffling saw Quakes start slow and only get slower. Insult to injury came in the form of Darren Huckerby's unfortunate fate. The former Norwich star, who was in great form last season, succumbed to a nasty season ending injury which may turn out to be a career ending injury. The star has been passed onto the terrific young defender Ryan Johnson. The American full back who used to play for Sweden's Orebro actually leads the club with an astonishing (for a defender) 10 goals but if TFC can silence him, the remaining SJE offence has been anaemic. It will be interesting to see what effect San Jose's poor season has on the fate of manager Frank Yallop. If the former Canadian MNT coach happens to become free, I can think of a certain red team with an interim head coach who should sign him immediately. That would definitely be no disaster.