THE STARTING 11: Other MLS playoff tie-breakers

Any MLS supporter who still has a club in the race for the final playoff spots knows by now how completely wacky the tie-breaker system is in the event of two or more clubs ending up even. MLS must have hired unemployed former Soviet scientists to come up with such a series of win-loss-tie possibilities for this weekend. Well not to fear, if your club still can't be separated from a rival, it will come down to these...

11. Beard growing competition

10. Least amount of "Barretts" wins

9. Mascot oil wrestling tournament

8. Must last 3 minutes in the ring with Adrian Serioux

7. Team with dirtiest MLS cheerleading squad goes to playoffs

6. Competitive hot dog eating competition hosted by Collin Samuel

5. Survivor: Harrison, New Jersey

4. Team with most back hair moves on

3. So You Think You Can Dive

2. "Don Garber’s Rock-Paper-Scissors Showdown"

1. Chip Butty making contest