"Wanna Buy Some Grass?"

Over the last few days the hypothetical dream of getting real grass at BMO Field has once again been floated. Apparently this hypothetical grass issue will be raised with the City Of Toronto at a hypothetical meeting set for this autumn. If it all goes well at this hypothetical meeting, our new hypothetical grass will hypothetically be laid in time for the 2010 season so that our very hypothetically improved football club can begin play on it as soon as possible.

Since we are obviously working in a framework of maybes, let's look into a hypothetical future, say sometime in the autumn, and have a peek at a completely hypothetical text message exchange between an MLSE big-wig and a high-ranking city official. Hypothetically of course.

Tom$$$: Yo, D! We @ MLSE want to put grass down at BMO! We luv soccer!

MayorDave: LOL!

Tom$$$: Why r u laughing???

MayorDave: Oh, u r serious? Gr8! No prob! Gr8 for T.O. You remember the big $ lease agrmnt. right?

Tom$$$: Which part?

MayorDave: T.O. gets a central all-year practice field...

Tom$$$: OMG that's pricey! We r not made of $!!!

MayorDave: LMFAO!!!

Tom$$$: Why u laugh?

MayorDave: Well u kind of r made of $$$.

Tom$$$: Hey, credit crunch and all that Dave-O.

MayorDave: Sorry T-Money, its in the agrmnt. and its for the peeps of T.O.

Tom$$$: OK, wot if we build 1 in deepest, darkest Etobicoke and maybe you pay for some of it?

MayorDave: Ummmm....

Tom$$$: Oh just forget it Dave!!! We tried our best!!! THE CITY WON"T LET US HAVE GRASS!!! WE R THE VICTIMS!!!

The above exchange is purely fictional and is no way based on any factual events or accounts. Resemblance to actual exchanges and texters is purely fictional. And hypothetical of course.