THE STARTING 11: David Beckham's shocking demands before joining Montreal's MLS ownership group

TFC travel to LA this weekend to take on Galaxy and their hairstyle enthusiast / Milanese loan arranger David Beckham. However, over the past week Goldenballs has been rumoured with another Canadian club. Monsieur Beckham is apparently interested in joining the "Montreal to MLS" ownership group avec le Joey Saputo but before that happens, he has a few demands...

11. "Nasal Cockney" must be added to Province's official language act

10. Sir Alex Ferguson is invited over once a year to throw a hairdryer at the Montreal player of his choice

9. Victoriaville, Quebec must be immediately handed over to his wife

8. New Montreal away kit: just Calvin Kleins

7. Must be allowed to produce hilarious French-Canadian film "Bend It Like Bloc Quebecois"

6. Demands time to grow sexy new Samuel De Champlain hair-do

5. If Quebec separates from Canada, they have to take his wife too

4. Saputo Foods to market new line of "Beckham's Own Salami"

3. Cartoon snowman "Bonhomme De Neige" must live in the attic year-round for his sons' amusement

2. Montreal subway system to be re-named "METRO:Sexual"

1. Province's new name? QueBecks