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Monday, July 4, 2011

THE STARTING 11: Perks of winning the NutCan three times in a row

"I say, one believes Vancouver to never get a NutCan. God Save Me."

Two days later and we've still got NutCan buzz! Some have advised to seek medical attention, possibly an ointment, but we care not. It's thrice as nice! Yes, in the grand scheme of world football winning the Voyageurs Cup isn't exactly the Jules Rimet but for suffering Reds supporters it was a sweet and almost fated victory. A great game to top off the best version of the NutCan tournament so far and an extra thumbed nose at our "perfect" cousins from the west coast. However, winning the NutCan means more than just a chance to hoist some silverware - there are a few sweet perks that go with being 3-time winners...
11. The cup comes filled with Mini Kit Kat bars
10. You get to shake hands with Prince William... but not Kate
9. Trophy counts as a passenger on 407 Toll Highway
8. FC Edmonton has to be your butler for a year
7. Team gets to represent Canada in the 2011/12 CONCACAF Champions League... and 2012 Miss Universe Pageant
6. It forces the Whitecaps to talk about SoccerBowl '79 for at least one more year
5. Get to hang out with the US Open Cup winners at all the hottest new nightspots
4. Nutrilite supplements up the ying-yang
3. Invited to torch the ceremonial first car at the next Vancouver riot
2. Allowed to fill trophy with pot pourri - put in team bathroom
1. Can order the illusive "Triple-Double" at Tim Hortons

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