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Thursday, January 12, 2012

Winter’s Draft affected by Chile conditions?

Now THAT'S a SuperDraft!

Wow that's a lot of punnage in one title. With reason though, as something is definitely going on behind the scenes which will help explain Toronto FC's two First Round draft picks at the MLS SuperDraft. (Don't you just hate those non-Super Drafts? So boring.) With their braintrust gathered in Kansas City, TFC did their best to confound those who do mock drafts.
With the 4th Pick overall, The Reds decided to go with consensus "best player available" in attacking midfielder Luis Silva. The 5-foot 11 Senior form UCSB upped his stock during the combines with an ability to find the open man, assisting on no less than 7 goals. Many NCAA experts predict the 23-year old to push for a starting role with TFC and at the very least make for very useful depth. Silva, a Los Angeles native, spent some time in the Chivas USA youth set-up and enjoys playing FIFA 08 - his new contract should help him at least get a used copy of FIFA 10.
POSSIBLE NICKNAMES: "The Silva Bullet", "Silva of Hope" (thanks to twitter's Darth Pingu for that one), "The Silva Fox" and an extra 20 points to the first broadcaster who announces a Luis Silva-Joao Plata goal combo as "The Silva-Plata"
After passing on their greatest need - defence - with the first pick, many TFC observers felt that the club must have known that they could pick up hulking defender Andrew Jean "The" Baptiste. If that was the plan, those wacky lumberjacks in Portland scuppered it by taking Baptiste with the 8th Pick.

With a giant Harden-sized hole remaining in the backline, The Reds seemingly took a gamble with the 12th Pick by taking Notre Dame defender Aaron Maund. The 6-foot 1 Senior was primarily a centreback in his NCAA career and flirted with Trinidad & Tobago's U-17 program. The 22-year old Massachusetts native was not predicted by many to go so high in the draft but with TFC's dearth in the back,  he may have a shot at a pro career more abundant than expected. Also, Maund attended a High School called The Roxbury Latin School which sounds like a salsa nightclub - so there's that.
POSSIBLE NICKNAMES: "Maundsta","The Long Maund of Rebound", "A-Maund Joy" plus an extra 20 points to the first broadcaster reading a TFC line-up who makes Iro - Maund sound like "Irie, mon"
So as the dust settled, Polaroids were taken and Sporting KC fans ended their xenophobic Canada chants, TFC walked off with these two young gents but a whole lot of questions. Firstly, the aforementioned hole in the defence wasn't really addressed; however, at press time (I have a card that says "PRESS" in my fedora ok? Jeez.) the TFC management team were making loud murmurs about two defenders who were about to be signed. Best guesses at their identities are Chilean Miguel Aceval and the return of Richard "GingaNinja" Eckersley which makes us think that this day may be long from over.
The second conundrum offered by these picks is that neither are Generation Adidas status which means that their potential salaries will count against TFC's salary cap - which is thought by most to be bursting at the seams. This off course would have only solution - the departure of some existing members of the club. Which makes us think this day is really long from over.
- L'impact du Montreal Impact chose defender Andrew Wenger with their 1st overall pick which immediately excited the French community who mistakenly thought Arsene Wenger had joined the club
- Whitecaps chose speedy forward Darren Mattocks who was blah, blah, blah - who cares - it's Vancouver
- New England Revolution chose Kelyn Rowe who won't have trouble with crowd phobias in front of the Revs' dozens of fans
- D.C. United's pick, Nick "Ponce" DeLeon, immediately drew the ire of Dwayne De Rosario who demanded a "fountain of youth" in his new contract
- Ethan Finlay, Columbus' 1st Rounder, demanded to know where the other 2/3 of Crew's new away kit was but was placated when he got to meet the three dudes on the club's logo
- Don Garber is still refusing to go by the name Dong Grabber
- News of Kenny Cooper's trade to NYRB being met with the phrase "Salary Cap - Shmalary Cap"


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