THE MATCHUP: In a state against Union

"I almost caught a foundation thiiiiiis big!"

TORONTO VS. PHILADELPHIA
　
BMO FIELD - SATURDAY 1PM ET
TV: TSN
　
THE KICKABOUT:
Morale in these football parts really couldn’t be much lower right now. The disappointing result for Canada in Panama was followed by a TFC performance against Chicago in midweek that was simply crappy. Hardly our finest bit of writing but crappy sums it up. Poor on the pitch, (understandably) apathetic in the stands - it hasn't been a good week in Toronto.
　
Paul Mariner downgraded his pre-match "we're very close" optimism down to "unacceptable" after Chicago left town and Darren O'Dea - quickly turning into a vocal leader - decried some of his teammate’s unprofessionalism in the match. All of this has just piled on to the sinking feeling many TFC fans (who already hadn't felt it) have about their club. What is worse is that prospects for the future no longer hold any kind of light at the end of the tunnel. Confidence in yet another re-build is close to non-existent in the stands.
　
Ironically, it is Philadelphia Union who come to town on Saturday. While the third year team has had its struggles this season, they are a club who this time last year (in their second year of existence) was preparing for the playoffs. Tom Anselmi's new fallacy is to claim TFC has been garbage for six years because unlike Vancouver, Montreal and Seattle etc. - we had no "foundations" in place. While this is largely based on make-believe fairy dust (a USL infrastructure is not MLS ready) - how long does an MLS "foundation" take to build Mr. C.O.O.? In our six years, most of the expansion teams who have followed us have left us behind and those without these mythical foundations, like the visiting Union, have proven that Mr. Anselmi has once again talked about something he has no right to talk about... football.
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME:
"The "Clubs With No Foundations Foundation' Charity Match"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
TORONTO: Ryan Johnson, Darren O'Dea, Luis Silva
PHILADELPHIA: Freddy Adu, Michael Lahoud, Carlos Valdes
　
THE ODDS:
Paul Mariner describing TFC's prospects at these intervals as such:
PRE-MATCH... "Not far from success!": 10-1
HALFTIME... "Some holes to fill for next season": 5-1
FULL TIME... "Plymouth Argyle's poor cousin": 2-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
Regular readers will know the stereotype-milking joy that a Philadelphia fixture brings us. The City of Brotherly Love has some great characters but since the mood round these parts is rather ill mannered we will instead look at a project we are producing for next year...
　
"PHILLY: THE MOVIE"... This is a heart-warming tale of a courageous but disease-ridden cheesesteak sandwich named Jeff who is unfairly dismissed from his job as a member of Fat Albert's gang of Cosby Kids. Determined to find justice, Jeff accepts a challenge to fight against Ivan Drago on Christmas Day after the Soviet kills his best friend... The Liberty Bell. After a shocking victory which sees the Moscow crowd chant his name, Jeff returns home to find that his Uncle - The Philly Phanatic - has lost all his money betting on a fight between Rick Mahorn and Randall Cunningham. After this final setback, Jeff's mother gets scared and moves the sandwich in with his auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.
　
POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "TFC LAUNCHES 'NO HEART FOUNDATION'"

And... Since it's Friday and we're feeling angry... and, since we are ill-mannered and support a team with no Plan B... and, since a portion of The Yorkies grew up on Council Estates... and, since the South Stand may resemble this in a year's time...