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Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Pickin' Ain't Eze

Too Eze...

Unlike Superman II, SuperDraft II was not an improvement on its predecessor. With a pool of Generation Kangaroos (A running shoe with a pouch!) players who failed to get drafted in the first two rounds and a complete lack of Terence Stamp - it was an expectedly bland afternoon.

We think it was carried live on PBS. Probably after that art guy with the white afro.

For their part in this increasingly useless exercise, Toronto FC drafted Kene "My Nickname Should Be Simple" Eze - a 6' foot 2 senior forward (university senior – not elderly) from Rutgers University. What can you say about a guy we will most likely never see after training camp? Good for you lad? High five?

Hmm, what to say to make this exciting... umm... Oh hey! Did you know that Kene Eze was once a finalist for the New Jersey Gatorade Player of the Year? BOOM! Also, did you know that Raivis Hscanovics was once a finalist for Riga Latvian State-Production Farms Beet Beverage Player of the Year? No? Well it filled out this paragraph nicely didn't it?

You can go now. I'm sure it won't be "hard" for you! LOLZ!

I meant "Eze"! Damn I hate the off-season.

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