The Yorkies' Regular Features

Starting 11       The Word       The Matchup       After 90       The South Stand Report

Sunday, June 1, 2014


Friends, allow me to regale a tale of terrible timing...

Well here's how it started...

15' - I'm bored.  Like super mega bored.  Nothing worth WATCHING has happened.  Well, it's warm and my drink is empty. Concession time has already come.

For the record, I rarely buy anything at the ground, and I NEVER walk away from a match in progress.  Never.  Then apparently this happened...

16' - SUB - Orr is hamstrung and Lovitz is in #hamstrong

17' - GOAL - I never go to the concessions during play.  That figures.  Didn't see it.

20' - PENALTY - So I come back to my seat and I've missed an injury, a substitution, an away goal, and this stupid thing.  All I see is someone down on the ground whinging about something and then a crowd roar of approval.

Never leave your seat.  Ever.

21' - GOAL - Defoe buries it low left side 

41' - Bekker free kick curls well into the party beer bro tent

Half-Time mood : pre-comatose. It wasn't terrible, but wasn't good TV, I suspect.

65' - GOAL - Viana, bah

65' - YELLOW - Bendik for bitchin at the ref

65' - SUB - Jackson off for Gilberto

66' - Gilberto has a go and flies over the bar #TakeAShot

71' - SUB - Osorio comes off for DeRo.  

"When will Osorio get injured (or come off)" was our prediction of the game.  The stats went as follows:

@RedWineRoz picked 47th minute
@theyorkies1812 picked 60th minute
@DuncanDFletcher picked 72nd minute
picked 82nd minute
picked 89th minute

So close Duncan. Kristin for the win.

73' - Bloom takes one in the face and he's down.   He'll continue but damn...

77' - YELLOW - Gilberto is booked for a Columbus player's elaborate rolling around one man play.

80' - YELLOW - Bekker in the books

81' - GOAL - Finally some open play stuff.  Header through over the top, half volley from Defoe and buries it.  No chance for Clark.  Absolute class.

89' - DeRo out muscled and out sized fights off a defender to draw a free kick

90' - GOAL - HOLY S#IT!  From the free kick, Lovitz free finds the head of Henry who buries it. Absolute mayhem ensues.

4 mins of extra time

It's over!  It's over!  Stone Cold!  Stone Cold!  Awmahgawd!  The Robins pull it off!

Full time : TORONTO 3, COLUMBUS 2

Man of the Match : Defoe for being all class.  No, thank you.

Goat of the Game : all of TFC for the first 15 mins.   Borrrrrrrringgggg

Ref Rating : 3 out of 5.  Blew some calls, made up for some later, felt like he wanted to be a part of the Match so badly.

Kit Spotting : SC Braga home wins, but there's a Colo Colo home as an honorable mention

I Am Not The Gaffer But... : I would give myself a good face-slapping whenever the team starts any half as uninspired as they tend to do.  Perhaps the next acquisition could be someone who could administer a good smack in the face

If You PVR'd it : start watching around the 15th minute, stop after the 22nd minute, then just fast forward until the 75th minute to give yourself a lovely crescendo to the finish.

What a damn finish.  Seriously, I'm still giddy about it 6 hours after the match.  Historically, Toronto is on the end of some of the most spectacular collapses in league history.  But somehow, against all odds, in the face of a very real tradition, they did it.  And if this is Henry's signature manoeuvre, then please, never change.

Player Ratings : Bendik 6, Bloom 6.5, Hagglund 6.5, Henry 6, Morrow 6, Jackson 6.5 [Gilberto 6], Orr N/A [Lovitz 6.5], Bekker 6, Osorio 6.5 [DeRo 6.5], Defoe 8, Moore 7

@ignirtoq wanted to write more, but the shock of such a thrilling finish required that he takes a nap, and nap he did.

No comments:

Post a Comment