The Yorkies' Regular Features

Starting 11       The Word       The Matchup       After 90       The South Stand Report

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

THE STARTING 11: Surprising clauses in the new MLS CBA

The ink is still wet on the new Major League Soccer Collective Bargaining Agreement. The owners and the union wrangled for months and took the 2010 season to the brink of disaster before cooler heads prevailed. A lot of the details have been slow in being released but if you read the very fine print, there are some surprises in store for the next 5 years...
11. All new MLS SuperDraft picks must do housework around owners' mansions
10. Players to get "Streamer-Related" injury pay
9. Bronze statue of shirtless Don Garber riding a lion unveiled in front of every MLS ground
8. Philadelphia no longer allowed to use "inflammatory" Union nickname
7. Released players get freedom of movement: choice between Kansas City and San Jose
6. Mo Johnston must immediately stop using trialists to build extension on his home
5. League can sell a player's rights to billionaires who hunt humans for sport
4. New DP's must donate 10% of salary to "charity" that buys new golf equipment for suffering, low-income, multi-millionaire football club owners
3. Better working conditions for the three construction workers on Columbus Crew's logo
2. Owners get to shoot Joe Cannon out of a cannon
1. Illiterate players get huge increase in celery caps

No comments:

Post a Comment