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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Letters from Camp: “More trialists? You bet Yourassowsky!”

Sweet Yourassed fashion scarf there Mikael!

Toronto FC released the names of more trialists joining the club in Florida today and they are... well... projects. Think more "new in camp" than "Nou Camp". The four players added to Florida’s Camp Wananfooty are:
MIKAEL YOURASSOWSKY: This 5 foot 11 Belgian defender had a bright start to his career, apprenticing with both Anderlecht and Argentine powerhouse Boca Juniors. However, the 27-year-old's professional record has been spotty and nomadic at best since with stops in Greece, Mexico and most recently a spell in Croatia's top division at NK Rijeka - ironically the most solid stretch of his career.
IVO "IN" DE HEUS: It's never a good sign if the most online research you can find on a player is his personal resume. Little is known about this Dutch midfielder apart from a lengthy stretch spent in the Ajax youth system (surprise!) and short professional stints with Dutch clubs Willem II and AGOVV Apeldoorn (Like Apple Jacks – just more footbally). Apparently caught the eye of TFC Assistant Bob de Klerk during his Ajax youth days.
JAMAL GAY: In an effort to help opposing supporters with their offensive chants, TFC invited Trinidad & Tobago International Gay to camp. Apart from his 6 foot 2 frame, there is little to get excited about over the 22-year-old striker. Came up through the Joe Public system before moving on to a lacklustre spell with Rot-Weiss Oberhausen in the German second division. Most recently loaned out to Turkish third division side Dardanel Spor A.S. who are apparently named after a popular brand of tuna - so that's something. Gay has scored 3 goals with the T&T National team but is always last in jersey sales.
JOEVIN JONES: Another Trinidad & Tobago International prospect. 19-year-old defender who has little professional record and emerged from the W Connection club. Despite 6 appearances with the T&T Nats he recently failed to make an impression at the Colorado Rapids camp and was released by The Maroons. First name is French for “Joe’s wine”.
While the club has yet to make an official announcement, club legend Danny Dichio let it slip on Twitter yesterday evening that he was indeed taking Jason Bent's place as Head Coach of the TFC Academy U-19 squad. Dichio, who by all accounts has taken his education as a young coach very seriously (since being forced into retirement), is a natural choice and the second good homegrown coaching move made by TFC after the recent Bent promotion to the 1st Team. There is word also that fellow "Wall of Honour" (barf) recipient Jim Brennan will be involved in a coaching role with the Academy leaving a massive hole in the club's Auto Show, cartoon narration and coffee retrieval departments.
Club owners MLSE released a report today slapping there own backs loudly and proudly over the profit that BMO Field has managed to make during its management by the sports, entertainment and panda meat juggernaut. The 2010 profit of $641,000 was in fact 3 times higher than projected and as part of their profit-sharing agreement, MLSE has provided the City of Toronto with $1.2 Million over the last 4 years. Mayor Rob Ford likely commented "Gravy Train. Union fat cats. KFC Double-Down. Argos." TFC supporters commented in unison "Ummm... roof?"


  1. I'm definitely getting a Gay Jersey,

  2. ^^^^
    What's a Columbus fan doing on this site?


  3. Sidra won't be with the team much longer.