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Friday, May 27, 2011

THE MATCHUP: "Yo homes to BMO!"

"TFC, up to no good - gotta play better in the neighbourhood"

TORONTO FC (15th) VS. PHILADELPHIA (5th)
 
BMO FIELD - SATURDAY 12:30PM
TV: GOLTV
 
THE KICKABOUT:
- How has Philadelphia become such a rounded squad in one season as opposed to the 15-year plan Toronto FC is currently under?
- Surely Union's leading scorer isn't the same Carlos Ruiz who pouted through five games with TFC in 2008?
- Has the pitch at BMO Field drained at all or has Thursday and Friday's rain just poured on top of Wednesday night's biblical flooding?
- Did playing 59 minutes and getting a free shower make Wednesday night's TFC starters too tired for Saturday's tilt?
- Are Union playing this well because they are Philadelphia born and raised and on the playground is where they spend most of their days?
 
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "UEFA Champions League Pre-Match"
 
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
TORONTO FC: Stefan Frei, Joao Plata, Dicoy Williams
PHILADELPHIA: Sebastien Le Toux, Faryd Mondragon, Carlos Ruiz
 
THE ODDS:
- MLS issuing scuba gear to both clubs pre-match: 10-1
- If losing, Aron Winter to abruptly pull team off the pitch when he claims he hears thunder in the distance: 20-1
- TFC supporters spontaneously breaking into a chant based on "Whoomp!" but with the words "Roof! Where it is?": 100-1
 
WHO ARE YA?
- Despite on-field success, there is a Plan B in place if Union aren't a financial success in Philadelphia - the club has a contingency to move to Bel-Air
- Carlos Ruiz may miss the match on Saturday as it usually takes him 2-3 weeks to show up at BMO Field
- MLSE had to petition Toronto Health to broadcast the UEFA Champions League Final on the BMO Field screens post-match. Officials feared that football fans watching Man United vs. Barcelona after 90 minutes of TFC would be at risk of confusion, depression and possible brain aneurysms
 
THE WAGER: 1-0 Philadelphia (2011: 11-5 with 4 exact scores)
FUTURE HEADLINE: "NEW BMO FIELD WATERPARK A HIT WITH KIDS"

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