THE MATCHUP: In a Real tough spot

REAL SALT LAKE VS. TORONTO
　
RIO TINTO STADIUM - SATURDAY 9PM ET
TV: GOL TV  ----RADIO: THE FAN 590
　
THE KICKABOUT:
If there is one place Toronto FC would have chosen to avoid while trying not to tie the record for worst start in MLS history, Real Salt Lake's Rio Tinto Stadium may be it. The notoriously difficult Utah ground will be an extra obstacle in Aron Winter's "100% Playoff Guarantee" despite all signs that the Dutch head coach is about to shake-up his stuttering side. It looks likely that Bavarian talisman Torsten Frings will return to his natural midfield position in an effort to kick-start the offence and stabilize the midfield while new faces may inhabit the porous defensive line. Only a 90 minute effort (with far fewer mistakes) will help overcome the strong Western Conference table-toppers "Jason Kreis and his Latter-day-Saints".
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "The Utah Jazz Festival"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
REAL SALT LAKE: Kyle Beckerman, Will Johnson, Alvaro Saborio
TORONTO FC: Adrian Cann, Torsten Frings, Reggie Lambe
　
THE ODDS:- Aron Winter only being 98% sure of making the playoffs in post-match comments: 3-1
- Reds deciding to replace back four with sister-wives: 10-1
- Jamaican International Ryan Johnson publically offended by Kyle Beckerman's natty dreadlocks: 25-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
Real Salt Lake's impressive ground Rio Tinto Stadium is located in the Salt Lake City suburb of Sandy, Utah. The booming town of Sandy was founded in 1981 after a visit from actor Gary Sandy, most famous for his portrayal of radio station manager Andy Travis on the hit sit-com WKRP in Cincinnati. The show had a massive underground following in Utah where its "racy" clips of rock n’ roll music and Loni Anderson’s cashmere encased assets were deemed "unholy" by the state’s conservative religious leaders.

Gary Sandy’s impromptu visit (actually a prolonged flight connection) is said to have helped break down Utah’s strict religious stranglehold and the new town of Sandy was developed to honour this occasion. The modern town is famous for its 23-foot statue of physician Dr. Johnny Fever and is an export leader in multiple-wife-management systems, tabernacles and John Stockton’s shorty-shorts.
　
POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "S*** JUST GOT REAL"
　
Since today is Friday, we STILL need a good dance and "surely something good has got to happen", we present to you a tune from one of Utah’s most famous musical acts…