AFTER 90: Hollywood Walk of Shame

"How many 'E's in Wiedeman?"



LOS ANGELES VS. TORONTO

FIRST HALF:

1' - Biggest news as the match gets under way is that Mr. Non-Olympia David Beckham will miss the match with a torn boxer-brief/ Royal Garden Party to attend

3' - Ashtone Morgan is apparently a midfielder now. So there's that.

7' - Robbie Keane an early pest to TFC's backline

9' - Freddy Hall with a fingertip save to force a corner. Stretchy.

11' - GOAL: Los Angeles - Juninho curls a free kick over a very out of position Freddy Hall.

LOS ANGELES 1 - TORONTO 0

20'- Darren O'Dea and Robbie Keane are duelling. This is what it sounds like, when doves cry... in Dublin.

24' - Galaxy's Swedish newcomer Christian Wilhelmsson is all kinds of good. Like IKEA meatball dinner good.

33' - GOAL: Los Angeles - TFC doesn't come close to shutting down Juninho who blasts a screamer from long distance.

LOS ANGELES 2 - TORONTO 0

36' - GOAL: Los Angeles - One professional team vs. a bunch of strangers as Robbie Keane playground chips a goal over Freddy Hall. Ridiculous.

LOS ANGELES 3 - TORONTO 0

38' - GOAL: Toronto - Bizzarro World as Terry Dunfield heads one home via a Galaxy defensive deflection. Shocking if this is the last goal of the evening.

LOS ANGELES 3 - TORONTO 1

44' - Even Eastern European gamblers have turned this one off.

HALFTIME: LOS ANGELES 3 - TORONTO 1

SECOND HALF:

45' - SUB: Quincy Amarikwa on for Richard Eckersley

49' - It's night time in the Netherlands and Aron Winter is snuggled under his big orange duvet and giggling in his sleep. We're here.

52' - Freddy Hall with a great fingertip save. He's capable... when he isn't woefully out of position or allowing big gooey loose rebounds.

60' - SUB: Eric Avila on for Andrew Wiedeman

61' - So the rumours were not true. Eric Avila wasn't in Witness Relocation

64' - This scoreline changes nothing - Bruce Arena still looks like Huckleberry Hound and Droopy's love child.

69' - SUB: Reggie Lambe on for Logan Emory

70'- A night of wacky position-switching subs. Position-posmition... Participaction Medals all round boys!

76' - Freddy Hall a very busy hand-flapping Bermudian as Galaxy attack in waves

80' - David Beckham's giant silver underwear statue of himself at the Eaton Centre could have had an effective game against this TFC midfield

84' - YELLOW CARD: Ashtone Morgan

85' - GOAL: Toronto - Luis Silva with a wacky floater from some hard work. Makes for a terribly flattering scoreline.

LOS ANGELES 3 - TORONTO 2

90'+ - GOAL: Los Angeles - Well that makes it look a bit more fair as Robbie Keane plays through Ashtone Morgan and finishes beautifully. That goal was his boyhood dream for those keeping score of Robbie's boyhood faves.

FULL TIME: LOS ANGELES 4 - TORONTO 2

PLAYER RATINGS: Freddy Hall 5 / Jeremy Hall 4.5 / Richard Eckersley 5 (Quincy Amarikwa 4) / Darren O'Dea 5.5 / Logan Emory 5 (Reggie Lambe 4.5) / Andrew Wiedeman 4.5 (Eric Avila 4) / Aaron Maund 5 / Terry Dunfield 6 / Ashtone Morgan 4 / Luis Silva 6.5 / Ryan Johnson 5

THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Luis Silva

THE BATH:

It sounds blasphemous in a way but it was almost a relief when Robbie Keane scored the fourth goal. Somehow TFC managed to find two goals in them despite playing incredibly poorly from start to finish. The two goals were both completely against the run of play yet at 3-2 there was the fear that some perverse apologists inside the club would gloss over the performance and say "see, not so far away! Promise!" Wrong.

As the 2012 season mercifully winds down, it is more than obvious, even to the most optimistic of TFC supporters, that they are not "close". Nowhere near in fact. Aside from Darren O'Dea and Luis Silva - there are few pieces that you would want to build around and that kind of overhaul is a major re-build - not a tinkering. No matter how things are spun. Promise.