The Roster Taketh Away, The Roster Giveth

 

You say goodbye, I'll say hello.

Before our generalissimo, @theyorkies1812, decided to take a brief sojourn away for the weekend, his words were something along the lines of "we'll probably cut and sign half of a squad, so you're f**ked, and don't go far from teh internetz in the next few days n00b" or something like that.

It only stops being funny when it happens to you.

For a few brief hours, Toronto FC's roster was down a man with the announced retirement of journeyman defender and Reel Big Fish lead singer doppleganger Danny Califf.  The 14 year veteran's acquisition at the top of the season was viewed as shrewd and necessary for a back line that could be described as cavernous.  With only 6 appearances to his name, he felt it was time to pack it up.  Personal favourite talking points from his retirement letter had to be his jab at a lack of playing time, referring to someone as 'peanut butter and jelly' (and if PBJ stands for something else, I'll be disappointed) and thinking that playing pro footie in 2 other nations that aren't his place of birth constitutes the distinction of having "moved around the world".  Sincerely, all the best to Danny and the family.  Just don't "Kovalchuk" us.  I personally can't take two of those in a row.

While the Robins cognoscenti reeled in the shock (or refreshed their twitter feeds expecting the announcement of a well travelled Uruguayan DP signing), Toronto FC announced bench filler the loan signing of Mark Bloom.  The 25 year old defender was rather the anchor for the NASL Atlanta Silverbacks, who finished 1st allowing 15 goals in 12 games.  We hope that when Bloom goes back to Atlanta at the end of his spell, he'll speak kindly of Toronto and avoid anecdotes that begin with "OMG, they're so dysfunctional, this one time...".  It also breaks a streak of 4 or 5 players in a row where a new acquisition didn't include the words "English Championship" or "Nelson's ex-teammate".

Hat tip to the ever-wonderful @kzknowles who is also a fan of ska.