THE STARTING 11: Things overheard at last week's press conference

"Did you hear the one about the bloody big eel?"

It has been just over a week since MLSE attempted to give us a 7-year brainwipe with the grand introduction of Jermain Defoe and Michael Bradley. While the hubbub from the beer and branding bonanza has just begun to subside, TFC will hope that the merriment from the day carries into the season. Of course amidst any cheery din are always a few sentences that are overheard floating amongst the crowd...

11. "Why is Raivis Hscanovics sitting behind De Ro?"

10. "It's been two hours and no one has mentioned our secret Argos plans sir! It's working! IT'S WORKING!!!"

9. "Mr. Defoe, this is the Raptors Dance Pack... "

8. "This is just like being at a match! The same chants, a bunch of drunk dudes and Reggie Lambe has been completely invisible!"

7. "Mr. Samuel! Step away from the buffet. Step. Away. From. The. Buffet."

6. "Oh that's Michael Bradley? Thank God, I thought Lex Luthor had escaped from prison!"

5. "It's about time TFC gave us something for free! Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go order four more season tickets and buy these new Jermain Defoe jerseys!"

4. "For the last time Mr. Lombardo, the double decker bus is not the Dufferin 29..."

3. "Funny how much more flavour Budweiser has when you remove the $12 dollar part."

2. "Hey... that's not Willem Dafoe!"

1. "If these guys think this is a bloody big deal, wait until they see the price of their 2015 season tickets!"