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Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Letters from Camp: “My girl likes to Partizan all the time”

Partizan's lone away supporter managed to start a riot

The boys are back in town! Well ok, not this town, a town on Turkey's south coast... but hey - they're back! The new look, oranje-tinted Toronto FC 2.0 took to the field for their first match today, a 1st Round match-up against Partizan Belgrade in the CONCAUEFA Cup... or preseason for those without imaginations. But try telling that to the big Rochester v Banik Ostrava preliminary match!
Today marked the first chance for Aron Winter & Co. to see the 2011 Reds perform in match conditions and the new manager fielded two different line-ups (one in each half) to maximize the playing time. Partizan Belgrade, who mark a big step up from TFC's usual preseason opponents of Florida senior citizen's teams, provided stiff competition as they awaken from their winter break. We go to The Yorkies' International Bureau in Antalya, Turkey for the match report. Actually it's a guy named Ali who sells kebabs and carpets to tourists but hey... it beats Twitter!
TORONTO FC 1st Half Line-up: Stefan Frei GK, Dan Gargan D, Nana Attakora D, Adrian Cann D, Gianluca Zavarise D, Jacob Peterson M, Dwayne De Rosario M, Nick LaBrocca M, Nick Soolsma F, Javier Martina F, Santiago Gonzalez Acero F
PARTIZAN BELGRADE 1st Half Line-up: 11 Balkan guys, mostly Serbs. Likely a Marko.
1' - Aron Winter starts 2011 as he means to go on, with a wide 4-3-3 with pushing wing play
3' - Smell of flatbread and spiced meats fills the air
6' - GOAL: Nana Attakora attempts a cross but ball disagrees and slips past Partizan keeper. TORONTO 1 - PARTIZAN 0
11' - Trilaist Gianluca Zavarise looking very lively and dangerous on the wing
18' - Partizan brought along three away Ultras but they forgot their flares at hotel and wave a cured sausage at Stefan Frei menacingly
25' - Gargan and LaBrocca looking adept at Winter's new wide tactics
26' - Lone Toronto tourist shows up late for match
28' - LaBrocca warned by referee for offering tax advice to linesman
35' - PENALTY: Santiago Gonzalez Acero brought down in the box by Partizan defender who thought the TFC striker had too many names
36' - Dwayne De Rosario takes PK but hits the post. No goal. De Ro demands to be made a Turkish millionaire - MLSE immediately agrees.
39' - Bob de Klerk invites some attractive Serbian journalists back to his room for some "shekshy times in der hot tub"
41' - PENALTY: Zavarise pulls down a Partizan player (something --- ovic etc.) in the box. GOAL on PK... TORONTO 1 - PARTIZAN 1
43' - Visiting Toronto tourist runs for the exits before the half to use the washroom, buy a Kebab Butty and a 15 Turkish Lira pint of Efes Pilsen - just like BMO, but more moustaches.
TORONTO FC 2nd Half Line-up: Milos Kocic GK, Ty Harden D, Doneil Henry D, Emanuel Gomez D, Ashtone Morgan D, Oscar Cordon M, King Gyan Osei M, Nathan Sturgis M, Bas Ent F, Maicon Santos F, Joao Plata F
PARTIZAN BELGRADE 2nd Half Line-up: Random Serbs, a couple of South Americans
49' - Partizan defenders keep putting hands on Joao Plata's 5 foot 2 frame and saying "look at little Mexican" in Serbian
55' - Visiting Toronto tourist returns to seat
58' - Little action on the pitch as both sides feel each other out
62' - Partizan go close to taking lead after player with beard hits the post
65' - TFC reply with close call as Bas Ent goes just wide with shot after sweet pass from King Gyan Osei
71' - Jim Brennan struggles to get hang of making Turkish coffees back at TFC HQ
75' - Academy product Cordon almost gives TFC lead but rattles the post after receiving pass from Joao Plata
79' - Toronto tourist leaves to catch Turkish equivalent of GO Train
81' - Maicon Santos blasts just over the bar from 25 yards out
85' - Cordon off injured - De Ro back in the game as sub
87' - Goat on pitch
88' - Goat on menu for team dinner
90' - RED CARD: Doneil Henry picks up two yellow cards quickly and is sent off
And there you have it, a quality start to the 2011 CONCAUEFA Cup live from the Cured Meat Capital of Eurasia. Aron Winter will be pleased that 22 players got a run out and that TFC got their first match experience with TFC (Total Football Club) tactics. Up next is 2nd Round CONCAUEFA Cup (aka preseason for you normos) next week against Dinamo Zagreb with rumours of a Red Star Belgrade match in the middle. Stay tuned for coverage of CONCAUEFA action as Puerto Rico Islanders take on Switzerland's Neuchatel Xamax... but not here... try some Puerto Rican Yorkelitos.

1 comment:

  1. Reports from several sources depict his as a roaming, ball possesion oriented young squad. I think we may have some interesting Ball this Spring.

    I wonder if De Ro did a cheque ripping gesture after his PK miss?

    Hmmm, Turkish Kebab truck at BMO beside the Poutine one?