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Monday, March 5, 2012

THE STARTING 11: Side effects of Toronto FC's youthful squad at Disney

I said "TFC" not "BSC"!

Everyone felt warm and fuzzy after Saturday night's "loss" to Vancouver Whitecaps at The Mickey Mouse Cup. Except maybe the Whitecaps. Yes they got a trophy but it was on the back of barely beating a team of teens, trialists and Nick Soolsma. Hard to lift a trophy proudly when you just traded shirts with a 15-year old. The young squad was a sign that TFC's commitment to its Academy program may soon start bearing fruit but it's not always easy to field such a young group of Reds...
11. Had to stock the team fridge with tons of chocolate milk in case they needed to drink something out of the trophy
10. Always wearing their shorts too low and baggy
9. Two players benched after Friday night bender of eating cotton candy and riding Disney World's "Teacups" ride until they were sick
8. A sudden push to re-brand club "Young Boys Toronto"
7. Players instinctively trying to press "X" button whenever they get close to goal
6. Team always having to share practice facilities with 4-year olds from "Timbits Soccer"
5. Long distance phone bills skyrocketing from Danny Dichio's insistence that he reads every player a story before bedtime
4. Second half was played with such ferocity as 10PM curfew was getting close
3. Defensive markings often missed as players stop during run of play to text their girlfriends
2. Coach Jason Bent forced to switch tactical gameday videos with re-runs of DeGrassi
1. Ugly child abuse accusations being hurled at Whitecaps

1 comment:

  1. OK Boys - gather round the phone and let Uncle Danny read you a story:

    Once upon a time there was a scrappy group of young unknowns, suspended & cup-tied first team players and a wee Jordan Hamilton who were set to play the evil WCs from the far off west...