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Thursday, August 16, 2012

THE SOUTH STAND REPORT - Toronto v. Portland... or Who jumps bitches? We jump bitches?

The "who jumps bitches" is in reference to what we thought the capos were singing.
Not you Timber Army.

Tonight at BMO, the all-star teams of Toronto A, B and C against a relatively full-Portland side that's struggling.

21' - GOAL - After a block off of the line from Avila, Sal Zizzo puts home the rebound.
Robins 0, Tree People 1 

37' - In reaction to what is a boring-ass first half, we did a group exercise which we will present in a new feature:

Say Something Nice About Toronto for the Next Two Minutes. 
  • They're monochromatic 
  • T-sounds are funny 
  • The field has grass 
  • We treat our bird better than MarineLand 
  • Sports are good exercise 
  • "FC" leaves it open to interpretation 
  • Best supported team in Ontario 
  • Team that's for the people, by the people, but only slightly better than the people 
  • The club that Liberty Village built. 
That was nice, positive and entertaining.

Half-Time Mood : sleeeeeeepy

45' - SUB - Lambe comes off for Wiederman

57' - GOAL - Silva has a shot stopped by Rickets, but the rebound is bagged by Hassli.
Robins 1, Tree People 1

59' - SUB - Eric Avila off for Amarikwa.

63' - GOAL - Fantastic stuff here. Morgan's cross finds the head of a sprawling Wiederman who flicks on to Silva for a header to the top corner.
Robins 2, Tree People 1

71' - Kocic comes up big with a stretching out save on a two man break.

80' - SUB - Makabuya comes on for Hassli. Remember Makabuya? Barely? I know...

82' - GOAL - Kris Boyd bags a goal against the run of play (or expected... either way)
Robins 2, Tree People 2 
EDIT - GOAL scored by Darlington Nagbe but our attention had been hijacked by the brewing "Ibrox-ing" of Section 110... (see below) You can't blame us really, poor man's Glasgow was a bit of a larf.  So passionate for a 3rd Division side!



2 minutes of extra-time 

FULL TIME: Toronto 2, Portland 2

Man of the Match : If Makabuya has deflected that ball into the net, it would've been him... but Silva gets the nod.

Goat of the Game : Ty Harden has a distinct fear of running forward when in the opposition's half and the ability to hang on to the ball for a second too long.  Felt bad for him, but it is what it is.

Ref Rating : 3 out of 5.  Started out rough but became more invisible as the game progressed.

As much as it was nice to get a ride home tonight, traffic was a bitch, so here's the belated report pre-prepping and going to work... Perhaps it was the substitute, but something kicked-in around the 55th minute and then they started playing.  The first half was about no one getting open and Portland closing down everyone with 2 defenders... The Rangers' infighting was likely due to one of them telling the aggro guy to calm down, and he wasn't having any of it, so they had a go... Everyone had their share of screw-ups tonight, pinning Harden down was more for consistency... The rule must be if Hassli scores once, then he's gonna have a go from everywhere on the park.  At least someone is shooting.

Player Ratings : Kocic 6, Harden 5, Eckersley 6, Cann 5.5, Morgan 6; Lambe 5.5 [Wiederman 5.5], Frings 6, Maund 5.5, Avila 5.5 [Wiederman 5.5], Silva 6.5 [Amarikwa 6], Hassli 6 [Makabuya N/A]


  1. Erm... so by my count, Silva had a shot that led to a goal... then came on as a sub? Cool!

    1. Amazing! We know! What a player! Ok, you got us - it was Avila that came off but I challenge you to tell the difference between them in a Pepsi Taste Test

    2. I was the only supporter to be kicked out that night.. and the only Irish catholic to kick the hun in the head... it was actually a 111-110 fight.... i've seen pics of the incident (I'm the dude in the red patch boys skullnbones) but am looking for a vid.. if u have one, email it to please