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Saturday, September 29, 2012

AFTER 90: "In New York, concrete jungle where bad dreams are made, oh"

"T to the Izzo, D to the Unfield"

NEW YORK VS. TORONTO

FIRST HALF:
1' - Scoreline still 0-0. Yet to come close to TFC's previous 5-0 drubbings in New Jersey. #progress
2' - Shock and horror ripple through the 10% full Red Bull Arena as Quincy Amarikwa rattles the post with a low shot
6' - GOAL: Toronto - Ryan Johnson scores on a gorgeous 20-yard strike that finds the top corner of New York's goal. Against all right minds it's...
NEW YORK 0 - TORONTO 1
10' - Red Bulls have a boisterous supporters group called the "Viking Army" - because when you think Harrison, New Jersey - you think proud Norwegian ancestry
14' - GOAL: Just to rebel against my Scandinavian cynicism, giant Swede Markus Holgersson rises barely to get his head on a Thierry Henry corner kick
NEW YORK 1 - TORONTO 1
21' - Ashtone Morgan with a great diving clearance after a Joel Lindpere cross into the box. Match has a frenetic pace with NYRB starting to control
25' - In their red shirt and white shorts combo, you can squint and pretend it's TFC 2007 all over again! Except without the warm fuzzy feelings, Danny Dichio and Carl Robinson and you know... hopes and dreams for a successful future
27' - GOAL: New York - Ouch. Thierry Henry saunters in and flicks the ball over to an absurdly open Kenny Cooper who taps it in while Richard Eckersley crashes into Freddy hall. Shambolic.
NEW YORK 2 - TORONTO 1
38' - On a petty note - at least many of the supporters at Red Bull Arena tonight will be abducted by C.H.U.D.'s on their way back to their cars
42' - The more respect Luis Silva gets in MLS, the more knocks he takes. Will need to get used to taking his lumps.
45' - Reds keeping it close but can they keep up with this high energy pace for 90 Minutes?

HALFTIME: NEW YORK 2 - TORONTO 1

SECOND HALF:
45' - SUB: Andrew Wiedeman on for Luis Silva
46' - Wiedeman did some of the best stretching in the modern era before coming on.
50' - Definitely a chippier match than recent outings. Darren O'Dea and Richard Eckersley are a High Street deep fried cheeseburger away from making this a Glasgow Saturday Night
65' - Just realized I didn't write a thing for 15 minutes. As you were.
68' - YELLOW CARD: Aaron Maund (flying buttcheck)
72' - Darren O'Dea not headhunting but rather "handhunting" Thierry Henry's filthy Irish-screwing paws.
77' - One goal lead doesn't reflect offensive dominance of NYRB this half. Terry Dunfield's head could still steal a point which Thierry Henry deserves just for being him.
80' - Freddy Hall fighting off a scrappy Tim Cahill. When will the Bermudian-on-Australian violence ever end?
83' - SUB: Eric Avila on for Reggie Lambe
85' - When things go well for TFC (I know, ha ha) I refer to Paul Mariner as an "Ipswich Legend". When they piss me off he reverts back to "that ex-Arsenal twonk".
87' - Andrew Wiedeman tests "the modern era's" finishers from distance. Saved.
88' - GOAL: New York - I think this one is a re-run. Thierry Henry bedazzles the TFC defence while Kenny Cooper stands in a acre of space alone only to slot the pass in easily.
NEW YORK 3 - TORONTO 1
90'+ - GOAL: New York - Thierry Henry. Different class to anything TFC has ever had. Floated from distance over a hapless Hall.
NEW YORK 4 - TORONTO 1
90'+ - "ex-Arsenal twonk(s)"

FULL TIME: NEW YORK 4 - TORONTO 1

PLAYER RATINGS: Freddy Hall 5 / Jeremy Hall 5 / Richard Eckersley 5.5 /Darren O'Dea 5.5 / Ashtone Morgan 6 / Reggie Lambe 5.5 (Eric Avila N/A) / Aaron Maund 5 / Terry Dunfield 5.5 / Quincy Amarikwa 5 / Luis Silva 5 (Andrew Wiedeman 4.5) / Ryan Johnson 6

THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Wow. Ryan Johnson? Sure.

THE BATH:
What do you expect here? A raging diatribe? Nope. All out of that sauce we're afraid. Just futility on top of futility and long past the point where any new angered description can address the frustration of supporting TFC. Not an unexpected result by any means, just another reminder that if MLS had a Division 2 - The Reds would be solidly mid-table.

We will say this though - if Paul Mariner wants to hold on to any of his rapidly diminishing reputation in TFC supporter eyes tonight - DO NOT come out and claim anything this evening was "positive", "so close", "best in ANY era" or anything that doesn't describe this club as a relegation-reprieved mess that needs 24/7 reconstruction between yesterday and next March.


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