AFTER 90: Reds in control - MLSE relocating Toronto FC to El Salvador

Big night for "Jamiroquai"

C.D. AGUILA VS. TORONTO

CONCACAF CHAMPIONS LEAGUE - GROUP 1

FIRST HALF:

1' - Despite having 93 different channels, Sportsnet can't find a space for kick-off without disturbing millions of Canadians on the edge of their seats for Boston Red Sox vs. Tampa Bay Rays baseball. They could have at least shown the Tea Men host the Rowdies.

3' - Baseball been berry, berry bad to us.

5' - Would watch match online but word just came through that El Salvador's computer is down.

10' - And we're on the television machine! First look at a Toronto FC line-up that would strike fear into the hearts of the bottom three teams in the NASL. Sportsnet forgets the internet exists and starts the game from kickoff giving this a strange Back to the Future feel.

8' (to the DeLorean!) - Ryan Johnson looking dangerous as he usually does... only in the CCL

16' - GOAL: Toronto - Quincy gives Aguila's keeper a coroner's report. Amarikwa's leaping header puts The Reds up early.

C.D. AGUILA 0 - TORONTO 1

17' - Genuine kudos to the three travelling supporters of TFC at the Estadio Barraza at a time when getting supporters to BMO Field is a challenge. Well done lads. Don't get kidnapped, MLSE will NOT pay for your release.

25' - C.D. Aguila's main shirt sponsor is "Mister Donut" which must anger Jim "Mr. Coffee" Brennan to no end.

30' - TFC's hodgepodge defence playing a strong line against Aguila's "ambitious" (aww bless) attackers.

33' - Aaron Maund breaks free and chooses to shoot rather than seek the very open man. His shot lands somewhere near Nicaragua.

38' - Literally dozens of home supporters on hand tonight. Was it a 10PM local start or was there a military junta?

40' - GOAL: Toronto - Tonight's captain Terry "Bear Feather" Dunfield taps in a solid low cross from Jamiroquai (as almost pronounced by FOX Soccer) to double the lead.

C.D. AGUILA 0 - TORONTO 2

45' - One-way traffic as the half closes with TFC fully in charge. That looks weird when typed.

HALFTIME: C.D. AGUILA 0 - TORONTO 2

SECOND HALF:

45' - And we're back live - or are we? Only Doc Brown knows for sure! Gigawatts!

46' - Scary start to the half as Luis Silva falls victim to a "very special" Central American tackle. Should have been a red card to Aguila's Henry "Kick of The Dead" Romero

54' - SUB: Eric Avila on for Luis Silva

55' - Darwin Bonilla leading a mini-evolution for Aguila's offence

57' - YELLOW CARD: Reggie Lambe

65' - Match footage will officially be lost before CONCACAF edits their "Best of Champions League" DVD

71' - Team who can't score only slightly bothering team who can't be bothered to score again.

75' - Ryan Johnson rattles the bar. If his CCL form leaves him, he will never score.

76' - SUB: Adrian Cann on for Dicoy Williams

81' - SUB: Andrew Wiedeman on for Reggie Lambe

83' - Andrew Wiedeman may actually be one of the best finishers in El Salvador's modern era.

85' - GOAL: Terry Dunfield crashes his second over the line and wins FIFA's "Least Brazilian Goal 2012" award

C.D. AGUILA 0 - TORONTO 3

89' - Broadcasters doing their best to draw in the mid-90's MTV crowd by continually making Amarikwa sound like "Jamiroquai" and C.D. Aguila vaguely sound like "C. Aguilera"

90' - Match draws to a close and no players lost in the pitch. Success!

FULL TIME: C.D. AGUILA 0 - TORONTO 3

PLAYER RATINGS: Freddy Hall  5.5 / Jeremy Hall 6 / Dicoy Williams 6 (Adrian Cann N/A) / Logan Emory 6.5 / Ashtone Morgan 6 / Reggie Lambe 5.5 (Andrew Wiedeman N/A) / Aaron Maund 6.5 / Terry Dunfield 7 / Luis Silva 5.5 (Eric Avila 5) / Quincy Amarikwa 7 / Ryan Johnson 5.5

THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Quincy Amarikwa

THE BATH:

We will never take anything away from a win - we just want a little side-order of sanity with it. We don't want to hear any "hats of to the lads"; "Quincy Amarikwa is the best crosser in the modern era"; or, "we have turned a corner". No, TFC did what they very well should have in beating little more than a semi-pro team in front of a stadium where TFC's three away supporters made the most noise.

It was a win that needs to be expected from this team yet one where The Reds were (sometimes understandably) guilty of taking their foot off the gas. A solid win over an inferior opponent. Good. That's what you are supposed to do. Do that to Santos Laguna and we will happily listen to any platitudes you may have TFC.

THE MATCHUP (with bonus STARTING 11!): Where ankles fear to tread...

They made Steve Guttenberg... a star!

C.D. AGUILA VS. TORONTO FC
CONCACAF CHAMPIONS LEAGUE - GROUP 1

ESTADIO JUAN FRANCISCO BARRAZA - TUESDAY 10PM ET

TV: SPORTSNET ONE

THE KICKABOUT:

There are probably few places that injury-riddled/quality-starved TFC would rather travel to right now than Central America - the non-continent where leg bones go to die amongst the divots. Alas, it is a return to the humid climes of Latin America for The Reds as San Miguel, El Salvador’s C.D. Aguila and their wonderfully bizarre Germanic/ Dutch/ Gay Pride/ Stonecutter's Society badge welcome the MLS wooden spooners.

On paper, this should be a match that TFC can win. Aguila are considered the minnow of the group and while TFC needs something of a Santos-imploding miracle to advance in Champions League - this fixture is the obvious "must win". That being said, TFC has been very poor lately (even by Toronto FC standards) and despite Paul Mariner giving a mind-numbing "hats off to the lads" for their apathetic performance against LA - few would be shocked if they tripped up on Tuesday night.

MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "El Diablo dos Ankle Bone"

 

PLAYERS TO WATCH:

C.D. AGUILA: Darwin Bonilla, Yaikel Perez, Henry Romero

TORONTO: Reggie Lambe, Ryan Johnson, Luis Silva

 

BONUS! THE STARTING 11: Ways that C.D Aguila is trying to promote TFC's visit

As we know all too well in Toronto, CCL Group Stage matches aren't the easiest of sales. Midweek evening fixtures against clubs that only Wikipedia could love are a challenge for club promotions departments from here to Panama. This of course got us wondering how our opponents from El Salvador would try to advertise to locals in an attempt to see Los Torontos...

 

11. "Watch a team who has met actual David Beckham!"

 

10. "Come for the futbol - stay to see whitey wither in the humidity"

 

9. "Fill the void left by the El Salvadorian Hockey League lockout"

8. "Free Burro Parking!"

 

7. "A manager in shorts! Mucho hilarioso!"

6. "TFC: The "Santa Tecla FC" of MLS"

 

5. "Your only chance to see the legendary Ty Harden"

4. "Toronto - "Dos Equis' Least Interesting Team in the World' 2012"

 

3. "Defeat the Yankee Jackal... ('s harmless neighbour)

2. "Free tossable bags of urine for the kids!"

 

1. "Because Montreal Impact just weren't available"

POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "INSULT TO INJURY AS TFC LOSE MATCH - MARINER'S SHORTS KIDNAPPED"



THE SOUTH STAND REPORT: Toronto v CD Aguila... or this is why you go to ALL the games, just in case something happens.

Sorry, I did this from memory.
I think they rescued a princess once...
it's like the stars above a crest for winning tournaments.

I think I could really get excited about this tournament... except nobody else really does.  Sure, the smaller Central American/Caribbean national champs probably look at this as "the big time" but I fear no one else does.  It's nice to win silverware and all, but it doesn't capture the imagination like, well, every other Champions League that is out there.  Mexican and US sides look at it with somewhat importance, but given how underclassed Toronto has been, yet snagged some significant results when needed, we won't be confusing a Monterrey v Real Salt Lake final with a Barca v Inter finale any time soon.  Underdogs love this tournament.  Big ones, not so much.

CD Aguila are the defending Clausura champions of El Salvador.  For those that don't know what that means, CD Aguila won the second half-season championship because what league would be complete without having more than one champion in a given year?  Which is funny, given Canada crowns a national champion between four clubs.  Welcome to CONCACAF! #amIRight?

Predictions were mostly pro-TFC.  @kzknowles had 3-1, @WakingtheRed had a absolute nutter of a 6-1, a few 1-0 (including mine), a 2-1 and a 1-0 to CD Aguila.

On to the match...

Quote of the Match:

BMO Field - Where they introduce the crowd to the players

~ LutonTony (formerly known as the President of the Luton Town FC
Supporters Club of North America) in reaction to the paltry turnout.

6' - Henry appears to head in a bad clearance by the Aguila keeper, and the ref calmly waits for the ball to cross the goal line before doing anything about it.

10' - GOAL - Corner kick delivered by Frings into the box, Silva heads it perfectly into the top left corner.  "Pick that out!" (a la Graham Leggat)
Robins 1, Naranjas 0

17' - GOAL - Silva breaks in right side of the box and slides a pretty ball to Lambe who pots it cooly.
Robins 2, Naranjas 0

37' - GOAL - Aguila free kick from 20 yards out forces Kocic to make a diving save but can't quite old on to it, Perez is there to tap in the loose ball.  Game on?
Robins 2, Naranjas 1

40' - GOAL - No.  Game over.  Henry fires a low cross in that's perfectly tapped in by Terry "Mother F**kin'" Dunfield.
Robins 3, Naranjas 1 

That's Terry Alonso!

~ man two rows in front after a comparison of TFC to Barca.

Half-Time Mood : Crushed optimism after realizing we only play them once at home.

48' - GOAL - Lambe puts a low ball just past the unfortunate Aguila keeper.  Magical.  Just magical.
Robins 4, Naranjas 1

58' - GOAL - Through ball from Silva to Johnson, who goes around the keeper and calmly fires into the empty net.  Shock was both that I'm in person for a thrashing in our favour AND that Johnson didn't fire it past the post.
Robins 5, Naranjas 1 

61' - SUB - Frings gets a nice round of applause and makes way for Maund.

Then this happened (if you like crap puns that could easily be headlines, keep reading) :

Lambe's skills are mutton to laugh about

~ Mikey

Hat-tricks don't come sheep

~ @WakingtheRed

He's playing so well he should be playing for Baa-aaa-celona

~ LutonTony

Seriously, I love all of you buggers.  Don't ever change.

72' - SUB - Johnson makes way for Amarikwa.

75' - SUB - Henry comes off for Taylor Hall.

Announced attendance was 5300.  For once they decided not to lie about who was there and I respect them for it.

3 mins of extra time.

Full Time : Toronto 5, CD Aguila 1

Man of the Match : Luis Silva.  He set up 2 and bagged 1.  He looked amazing in the first half.  He was looking like a 10 but everyone took their foot off the gas by the 70th minute.  Forgiven.

Goat of the Game : Are you serious?  At 3-1 there wasn't going to be one.  At 5-1, someone should go on the Wall of Honour.

Ref Rating : 3 out of 5.  I know its generous after the early non-goal call back, but he was bad for both sides and kept his cards in his pocket for most of the match.

Kit Spotting : Saw a Sport Club Internacional from Brazil which should win, but I was such a nerd for the awesome Angola kit from the World Cup in 2006 that it wins.

Wow.  Heady stuff.  It was hard to tell if Aguila were taking Toronto too lightly or were just over-classed in general.  They took a helluva beating... The gentleman in front of me remarked at how relaxed Frings looks every time he takes a corner.  Torsten has probably taken more free kicks, in practice and in games, than I've ever kicked a ball... Mr. Reggie Lambe, please do not take these lame puns under any offense.  We genuinely respect your contribution to this side.  Thank you... Silva did look like a seasoned pro and by no means a rookie.  Half expected Frings to hand him the armband when he was subbed off... Wiedeman is a little awkward out there.  He's in position, but doesn't look the most comfortable... I suspect that there will be a papering or a Groupon for the next Champions Lg match against Laguna Santos.  Sub-6000 isn't enough for that match.

Match Ratings : Kocic 6, Henry 6.5, Eckersley 6, Emory 6, Morgan 6, Lambe 8.5, Frings 8 [Maund N/A], Dunfield 7.5, Wiedeman 6; Silva 9, Johnson 7

THE MATCHUP: Shh!... It's Champions League (Now with 30% more Freddy Hall!)

Don't ask about the triangle



TORONTO FC VS. C.D. AGUILA
CONCACAF CHAMPIONS LEAGUE - GROUP 1
　
BMO FIELD - WEDNESDAY 8PM ET
TV/RADIO: NONE
　
THE KICKABOUT:
If an El Salvadorian footballer dives in a forest but it's only streamed online... does he still make an "agonizing" yelp? This is the fixture to answer such questions as Champions League returns to Toronto for the first time since The Reds fell to Santos Laguna in the semifinals of the 2011/2012 edition. Due to the Olympics and apathy, there is no traditional broadcasting of TFC's opening CCL fixture this year in what will be a much harder go of things compared to previous trips through this tournament. With the new format seeing only one team per group advance and TFC landing Santos Laguna (again) along with Wednesday night's foe, C.D. Aguila of El Salvador, los going may be mucho rough.
　
Like many Central American clubs, Aguila is a great unknown to us up here in the tundra - but they were 1976 CONCACAF Champions. That being said, the Bee Gees were big in '76 as well. They will play as most Central American teams play and shoddy refereeing will allow it. The question will become if Paul Mariner's more direct tactics will work in the CCL like Aron Winter's managed to. The direct pass/little possession style doesn't usually win in Continental competitions but hey, if it doesn't, at least no one will have seen it on TV.
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "El Webtraffico"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
TORONTO: Reggie Lambe, Ryan Johnson, Luis Silva
C.D. AGUILA: Darwin Bonilla, Yaikel Perez, Henry Romero
　
THE ODDS:
- Attendance at BMO Field resembling Olympic venues: 2-1
- TFC announcing a solid 18.000+ attendance: 3-1
- Supporters looking for online stream distracted by a hilarious cat video on YouTube - forgetting that the match was on: 5-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
Aguila has one of Central America's most unique club badges (see above). The infamous badge seems to draw from many European influences and this is backed by club information on their logo translated from Spanish to Dutch and then into English here:
"The gentleman's shield of C.D. Aguila harnesses the positive power of our club's colonial overlords. The great Germanic eagle that has always been a symbol of peace and friendship world over; the Spanish-style badge representing the Conquistadors who did so much good in Latin America and slaughtered only those they wanted to; The Orange of the Nederlander represents the harmony, teamwork and selflessness we crave; the Greek laurels symbolize the healthy, stable financial nature of our club; and finally the "A" in an upside down triangle. This is a secret."
　
POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "REDS LOOK SHAKY AFTER TWO SHOTS FROM AGUILA"
　
BONUS SECTION: READY FREDDY
Since you spent the time getting to the bottom of this match preview, you deserve to hear that Toronto FC solved its defensive crisis today with the signing of a backup goalkeeper. As long rumoured here and in most TFC circles, the club inked 27-year old Bermudian Freddy Hall to a deal today providing Milos Kocic with some experienced relief. What this means for either Kocic or Stefan Frei long-term is up in the air but with Hall having a bit more professional pedigree than youngster Quillan Roberts, TFC's coaches won't worry as much every time Kocic looks banged up.