AFTER 90: Leiwekes Just Don't Understand

Which one of you is Cassano and which one is Adebayor?

PHILADELPHIA VS. TORONTO

PPL PARK

 

Let's face it Jazzy Jeffs, this season hasn't been fresh since April. If TFC had a mom it would have long been scared and moved the club with it's Auntie and Uncle in the NASL. Alas, we don't have a benevolent Uncle Phil to set us straight, just a President that has sold monorails to Brockway, Ogdenville and Bel-Air, so chances are high we'll be right here next year as well. Hey maybe we can get our wacky cousin to move in. Carlton! Cole.

In the meantime, our annual meaningless trip to the Suburb of Brotherly Love gives us the chance to whip out some local flavour... our Fresh Prince theme tune! If you came here for match analysis... you need to ask yourself some deep questions about your life choices. Enjoy!

 

 

''THE FRESH TIM OF HOT-AIR"

Now this is the story, call it a fable

Another year spent at the foot of the table

And we'd like to take a minute, we won't be mean

We'll tell you The Reds will be the same in 2014

 

Southwest of Philadelphia a crap game played

On defence is where they spent much of the day

Long balls, hacking, passing like fools

Tactically inept with no talent pool

 

We've got a couple of guys, they are just sort of good

The rest should be benched like other clubs would

2013 is ending just like all other years

We say "The only way to watch it is drink lots of beers"

 

Now Leiweke's in town and yells "Have no fear!"

"Things will be different this time next year"

If anything we could say we've heard this before

But this fool will blow cash on Adebayor!

 

So we're waiting 'til New Year to buy our tickets

Yelling at T-Bez "You've signed the next Rohan Ricketts!"

Safe in the knowledge. we'll be sad in the stands

To watch Ryan Nelsen's brand new 5-Year Plan

 

 

FULL TIME: PHILADELPHIA 1 - TORONTO 0

THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Uncle Phil