THE MATCHUP: "Houston we have etc. etc."

God speed L'il Danny



HOUSTON (12th) VS. TORONTO (16th)
　
ROBERTSON STADIUM - SATURDAY 8:30PM ET
TV: GOLTV
　
THE KICKABOUT:
- Is there any way that TFC can repeat its May 7th performance against Houston where they won 2-1 and actually looked promising?
- Will Dynamo's attackers even notice whether or not Ty Harden is in the line-up?
- When will the "will he, won't he" de Guzman drama come to a head?
- If Dan Gargan continues to be average will his local backers continue to exalt him to Lionel Messi status?
- Is the following 10 days off more of a blessing for Toronto FC or for its supporters?
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "El Problemo"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
HOUSTON: Will Bruin, Brian Ching, Brad Davis
TORONTO: Richard Eckersley, Nick Soolsma, Nathan Sturgis
　
THE ODDS:
- Texan supporters un-ironically deriding TFC as "un-American": 2-1
- Winter & de Klerk getting patriotically weepy over Houston 80's-style Oranje kits: 25-1
- NASA looking for new monkeys to send into outer space - contacting Toronto FC: 50-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
- When Dynamo move out of their current home Robertson Stadium, the venue has been earmarked to host local events such as Children's Tractor Pull, Warren Moon's XXX Square Dancing League and "Electric Chair Sundays"
- On the topic of Houston's new stadium, many assume that Dynamo Stadium will be named after the team but it is actually named after famous Texan Running Man "Dynamo". R.I.P.
- Houston, famous for its Space Program as well as its citizens' love for firearms, has combined the two loves for a post-match "Shoot at the Moon Night". Those attending the Dynamo v TFC match are invited to come onto the pitch and try to shoot into Earth's orbit. Closest shot gets a high-powered assault rifle autographed by Dynamo coach Dominic Kinnear!
　
THE WAGER: 2-0 Houston (2011: 16-9 with 4 exact scores)
FUTURE HEADLINE: "COUNTDOWN TO 2012 AS REDS HAVE FAILURE TO LAUNCH"