MLS LOGO WEEK - Getting to know your Eastern Conference

Hot on the heels of yesterday's truly* (*not true whatsoever) revolutionary, ground-breaking introduction to MLS #LogoWeek here at The Yorkies, we conclude the parade here today.

After hauling our pioneer wagon of logos and high-end football analysis through the West we turn eastward ho! No you're not a ho - it's a declaration of direction. God, you lot are so PC! This time it's the Eastern Conference's turn - home to thriving, bustling cities, the beauty of the Atlantic seaboard, the mighty Great Lakes... and Montreal is there too. Enjoy it you whores. As in "Go East Whore!" (It's a geography term, trust us.)

CHICAGO FIRE
AKA: The Yallopian Tubes
SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THEM: "Without them there is no Copa Del Grandos Lagos. Plus we can both agree Lake Erie sucks."

COLUMBUS CREW
AKA: The Crewp
SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THEM: "Thanks for giving MLS' dirtiest mascot, Crew Cat, a nice warm home"

MLS LOGO WEEK - Getting to know your Western Conference

 

The 2014 MLS season is but days away and the North American football punditry industry is in full force. Statistics, depth charts and player profiles are coming thick and fast as some of MLS' brightest minds attempt to predict this season's outcome.

Then there is us.

Why buy the milk when the cow is busy making a solid Raivis Hscanovics gag? Here at The Yorkies we instead take our cue from MLS' most important annual event, #JerseyWeek, and present you with #LogoWeek, where we parade our own take on every club's logo and throw in our in-depth, scientific scouting reports with the info the other guys are too afraid to print!

We start with the Western Conference. Mostly because they are so whiny. What gives west? You've got nicer weather, mountains, plains... um... Alberta and Idaho? Suck it up Pacific buttercups. Never Mind the Rockies, Here's the Western Conference!

 

CHIVAS USA

AKA: The Undera Chivas
SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THEM: "Making Toronto FC look slightly more professional since 2007"

 

COLORADO RAPIDS
AKA: The Ron Burgundys
SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THEM: "They have more silverware in the last 8 years than owner Stan Kroenke's other football club"