Letters from Camp: United they stood

"Aww Adrian... you didn't have to"

From a results point of view, Toronto FC's participation in this year's Carolina Challenge Cup won't go down as their most successful stop in Charleston. Winning a friendly tournament trophy is never high on the pre-season goals list but this year in particular, the tourney was obviously a training ground for The Reds and not a place for wins. Going into tonight's final match against DC United, many wondered if the performance would be closer to what is expected 7 days from now or a continuation of that training style.
　
Facing DC United was a good test as the club from the US Capitol is coming off a season even worse than the dreadful one seen in Toronto. United are rebuilding under a new coach with a new style and will be a team TFC needs to be superior to if they want to dream of playoffs. However, when DC add a guy like Charlie Davies while Toronto adds Nick Soolsma, many will see United as the better of the two clubs going into 2011. Here's briefly how the "Battle of the Titans" went down earlier tonight...
　
TFC match starters... Frei, Gargan, Attakora, Harden, Yourassowsky, Sturgis, Cordon, De Rosario, Zavarise, Peterson, Maicon
2' - Yourassowsky starts as he means to go on by "assing" up a defensive marking
7' - Literally dozens of rabid fans on hand. Some actually rabid.
12' - GOAL! Charlie Davies eats 3 TFC defenders alive and blasts it high past Frei
DC United 1 - Toronto FC 0
15'- DC's 87-year-old Canadian GK Pat Onstad a symbol of good socialized health care. DC Republicans will hate him
19' - PENALTY DC's Dax McCarty hauls down Gianluca Zavarise leading us to chant "When you're fouled from behind like a big pizza pie, Za-varise!" GOAL! De Ro takes PK
DC United 1 - Toronto FC 1
25' - Toronto energized by goal and controlling play
28' - Stefan Frei does a major Aron Winter no-no and boots a long-ball... however Maicon Santos gets on the end of it and GOAL! Past Onstad's walker!
DC United 1 - Toronto FC 2
32' - Oscar Cordon showing his youth and having his worst game
34' - Charleston advertising hoarding of the night: "RENT A PARTY TENT! 971-GOAL Oooh! I can get some Piggly Wiggly and eat it in my party tent!
37' - Two quick yellow cards for Yourassowsky leads to a RED CARD and a sending off. You sir, are an ass owsky. TFC down to 10 men.
43' - Charleston Battery president/ amateur announcer Andrew Bell wonders aloud why Nick LaBrocca didn't start tonight. Maybe he had his tax forms filled out too.
　
HALF TIME: DC UNITED 1 - TORONTO FC 2
　
45' - Overmatched Oscar Cordon off and replaced my The Prodigal Defender: Adrian Cann. Someone must have bought the team a box of Pot Of Gold chocolates
50' - DC pouring on the pressure trying to get an early equalizer. Makes us miss the show The Equalizer
58' - Pretty sure Pat Onstad just put Metamucil in his water bottle
61' - GOAL! TFC can't hold back the offensive wave and Joseph Ngwenya puts the ball past a sprawling Frei
DC United 2 - Toronto FC 2
67' - Andrew Bell informs us that the pro shop at Charleston's Blackbaud Stadium sells vuvuzelas. Precious.
71' - Matt Gold in for Maicon Santos. Bob de Klerk yells "I love Gooooold!"
75' - Reds holding their shape well and managing to counter-attack
78' - Javier Martina on for Dwayne De Rosario
82' - Two party tents successfully rented during the match. Happy Birthday Bobby
89' - Gianluca Zavarise ends a good night and is replaced by Keith "BOOYAH" Makubuya
91' - TFC close out the match with some solid defending.

FULL TIME: DC UNITED 2 - TORONTO FC 2
　
So, after a journey that started in late January in Turkey, Toronto's preseason matches are over. A solid draw tonight that was equally promising and frustrating. While the defensive lapses continue, The Reds managed to hold it together despite being a man down for nearly half of the match. Good performances by Zavarise, De Rosario and Frei were tempered by less than stellar nights for Cordon and Yourassowsky.
　
There is a sense this evening that it is upwards and onwards for TFC with a week to go before the opener in Vancouver. The sense of optimism was encapsulated by Adrian Cann's very public post-match mea culpa. "I'd like to apologize to the fans in Toronto, the organization and my fellow teammates, as well as Aron" said the remorseful Cann who with that hopefully shut the door on the only negative episode of camp. Changes are still possible but tonight's TFC may be what we can expect when the season begins in 7 short days.

Letters from Camp: Avoid the bike shop… TFC make Gordon jump

Today's headline is a treat for you fans of Diff’rent Strokes “very special episodes”… and Arnold's friend Dudley

GORDON IN A FLASH
A little Friday wheeling and dealing is on order today as TFC have finalized a deal with Chivas USA for 29-year-old forward Alan Gordon in exchange for midfielder/ personal injury lawyer Nick LaBrocca. The addition of Gordon is unlikely to get supporters’ hearts racing and some feel that LaBrocca was a steep price to pay for a squad-type player. The American striker has spent most of his career with LA Galaxy but hasn’t exactly been a prolific scorer at MLS level. His best stretch was on loan with Portland Timbers in the A-League/ USL early in his career. It is a curious move to say the least as he doesn’t exactly seem a likely candidate for “total football” but he is a sturdy target man and a good leader. The move may however, fuel the fire of rumours that Maicon Santos has fallen heavily out of favour with Winter & Co. In regards to LaBrocca , the deal is a bit surprising as he seemed to be fitting in very well by all accounts in the new system – obviously TFC didn’t need his help with their taxes after all.
　
LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE
As widely rumoured in Toronto FC circles (including these parts) for the last few days, the club has signed 24-year-old British Columbian Gianluca Zavarise on a permanent basis. The young Italo-Canadian seems pleased to return home to Canada after a nomadic career that has had stops in Italy, Germany and Greece. Reds manager Aron Winter seems to be equally pleased to have signed the youngster saying "He is a young player with skill and has a bright future. We feel he will fit well into the system that we want to play”. There's not too much to add to the Zavarise bio, so here's a chant to use: (to the tune of "That's Amore") "When... Gianni makes a pass, with a touch full of class, Za-varise! When he bombs down the wing, sends a cross flying in... Za-varise! Bada-bada-boom, bada-bada-bing, Za-varise!" Remember where you heard it first!
　
THE DOTTED LINE
While there still seems to be a little confusion over exactly how much prodigal son Adrian Cann will earn this season, it looks as if his defensive partner may soon get a raise too. Whispers attributed to the CBC's John Molinaro hint that Nana Attakora is deep into negotiations with the club with the a six-figure deal seeming likely for the promising Brampton native. The sticking point for the young Canadian International may only be the duration of the new deal with Attakora seeming to prefer a shorter deal rather than locking down his long-term future with TFC just yet.
　
In other contract rumourage, which can be filed under “Miscellany”, TFC Director of Player Development Paul Mariner dropped an odd piece of info during a radio interview. Speaking on The Fan 590 earlier today, Mariner mentioned that TFC was recently "close" to signing a great player of "the modern era" with English Premier League pedigree. Obviously he gave no further hints other than the deal "fell through" but he did go on to hint that another scoring threat could be signed soon which likely alluded to Alan Gordon. As for the former EPL star rumour - I bet Paul Gascoigne's ears were burning!
　
No really, I bet Paul Gascoigne's ears were literally burning.
　
OH! THAT'S WHY YOU COULDN'T SCORE! OUR BAD!
Finally the mystery has been solved! The reason Chad Barrett kept shanking one-on-one opportunities everywhere except for in the net was because he wasn't getting good service! Talking to a local Los Angeles media outlet Barrett explained his spotty scoring record at TFC compared to his new Galaxy role as such: "I know if I make runs that I used to make run back then, I know I'm going to get the ball ... when I wouldn't get the ball in Toronto," said the rich man's John Rooney. Uh-huh. Pretty sure we heard similar when Mo Johnston brought Barrett here from Chicago Fire too. Hard working guy? Yes. Average striker at best? Absolutely. This should end The Chad's local pseudo-hero worship already. Please.

Letters from Camp: Step 1 - Place tail tightly between legs...

Adrian was not happy about the BMO Field roof plan

THE CANN CAME BACK
Ding. Ding. Round one to new manager Aron Winter in a TKO. When Adrian Cann, last season's "MVP" (apparently), left camp in a contract snit last week, TFC fans were treated to something new - a hardline, no bull reaction from management. Winter made it immediately clear that Cann's new contract offers were off the table and the defender/ James Franco ass double would only be welcomed back if he apologized to the team. Well guess who's getting flowers and chocolates?!!!
　
Yes, after likely finding that the only interest outside of MLS for his services were Scandinavian 2nd divisions, Adrian Cann now says he wants to return to the club. Well, at least that's what his agent/ negotiating genius Sanford Carabin says. Carabin also dropped these absolute quotable gems:
"At the end of the day, he wants to play here. This is where he grew up" Aww. Sweet.
“He’s going to take the high road on this. He’s going to go back and show them that he’s worth the money that he wants.” Umm... we think you need a new road map.
Carabin then called a Cann's departure a “principled stand.” Uh-huh.
　
So, in the end, if Cann and TFC do indeed become BFF's again, the defender would end up having to accept a contract which is reportedly $35,000 less than one he turned down last month. He also would have used up all of the good will Toronto fans showered on him and most notably ends up looking like an ass. That is some top level agenting Mr. Carabin. Kudos. Selfishly, I enjoyed it - the whole ordeal has filled The Yorkies Twitter with so many great Zoolander references.
　
JAY AND SILENT LUKE TALK BACK
A few weeks after landing the rights to MLS in Canada, TSN has put together it's new on-air commentary team. Luke Wileman, most recently of GOL-TV and random TFC miscellany will be handling the play-by-play, while former Team Canada captain and Ipswich/Wigan legend Jason deVos will provide the colour work. It will be a challenge for the two as their first big job may be explaining to other TSN employees "what a soccer is". Footy fans are still holding their collectives in Canada to see what kind of job TSN will do with MLS coverage seeing as football's existence has usually been considered a nasty rumour at the network. It sure will cut into their regularly scheduled summer programming of "NHL Preseason Countdown".
　
EASY, PEASY ZAVARISE?
It would hardly be a major shock but the rumours floating around TFC's South Carolina camp were that Canadian midfielder/ wingback Gianluca "Nickname Pending" Zavarise would be the next trialist to sign a full deal with the club. The 24-year-old British Columbia native saw more action in Turkey than he has in the US this spring but his versatile positioning could help his cause. With a week to go and giant holes where the roster should be, few would be coloured oranje with shock if this came true.