A pinch of Salt - Plata dealt to RSL

Joao Plata meets with Real Salt Lake management



A few days after Joao Plata's agent attempted to tell the world that his client was being loaned out to Real Salt Lake by TFC, the two clubs decided to make things more permanent. The news from the adoption agency came through this morning that "Los Webster" will now be under the care of Mormon Popadopouloses (Popadopouli?) with Toronto receiving a 2015 SuperDraft 2nd Round pick for their troubles.
　
Whether Plata can rediscover some of the brief magic he had during his early TFC stint will be interesting to follow. There is no doubt that the pint-sized Ecuadorian became a quick fan-favourite but the reality that he seemed "found out" by MLS defences became apparent. Whether it was because of physical manhandling or a drop in confidence, Plata went from sparkplug to meek youngster quickly. With the handy tool of retrospect, his protracted re-signing was likely down to his fan-favouritenessosity rather than any future ability.
　
Plata seems to take his cues from his agent a little too easily as was evident when he departed Toronto last year on loan before the club was ready to go public with the news. The fact that his agent pretty much telegraphed this news last week seems to show more of the same. In the end Plata wasn't wanted back in Toronto and had reportedly fallen out of favour with his hometown LDU Quito. Perhaps a new start in "The Saltiest Town on Earth" is the tiny tonic he needs. In parting, Kevin Payne commented "It made sense for our club to move him for value as we can continue to build the team we want..." Now Kevin, about time to get some new orphans in no?

LETTERS FROM CAMP: Kiwis, Barracudas and Platitas, oh my!

Well that's a Sticky Wicket...



NILSIN? PRISINT. DIFINDERS? HAPPY.
Not only are TFC trumpeting the fact that they have "solved" the Caramilk Secret their seven-year defensive woes but they are apparently a blissfully happy bunch too! It seems like supporters weren't the only ones doing a bit of hand-wringing over new manager Ryan Nelsen's protracted arrival with Darren O'Dea admitting "Certainly it was something I was concerned with when he was first appointed," . However, with Nelsen's February 1st arrival on the back of a flock of kiwis (say unconfirmed sources) now confirmed, it seems like the defensive "gang" including O'Dea, Richard Eckersley and newcomer Danny Califf are a delighted bunch of bros. Now if we could just sign two cheery midfielders and a couple of gleeful strikers we could all share in the joy.
　
YOU GOT RESERVED
The long rumoured cuddle party between MLS and USL Pro (the pseudo-North American but not really in Canada 3rd Tier league) has been confirmed. In a perestroika-like handshake (less politburos, more City Islanders) the MLS will blend its Reserve Team schedule with the existing USL Pro division in a mosaic-like interleague kickathon. As part of the long-term cooperation, which has advantages for both parties, some of the 14 USL Pro clubs will be "affiliated" with MLS clubs which will see both player and corporate sharesies. We are really, really hoping that TFC can somehow get their paws on an affiliation with Antigua Barracuda FC. They play in Sticky Wicket Stadium. No other explanation needed. Fine...S.D. "Special Delivery" Jones. You happy now?
　
THEY WILL LOAN OUR "SILVER" - OH YEEE-AH?
An unusual tidbit was making the rumour rounds this morning and it concerns our tiny orphan Joao "Los Webster" Plata. Whispers from the Holy Mormon Kingdom of Utah claim that there is talk of Real Salt Lake loaning Plata from Toronto on a year-long agreement. As stated in the article, the original source of the rumour is most likely Plata's own agent so you are probably best to take it with the biggest grain of salt you can find. If only there was some kind of Salt Lake for such an occasion. Inter-MLS loans are practically unheard of so the most likely scenario is that a desperate agent is trying to get people north of the Rio Grande remembering that Plata exists. Unwanted at TFC and by LDU Quito by most accounts, "Los Webster" may be all out of Popadopolises.

Did someone order a "Special Delivery"?

Toronto FC wages "War on Puns"

Goodnight, sweet prince.



Let's cut the crap Toronto FC. We know what you're up to and yes, we're taking it personally. You aren't making personnel moves based on talent, roster size, salary cap or international slots. No... you wily devils are trying to destroy the TFC blog industry one pun at a time! We already know you do everything in your power to control the message ("who went to Glasgow with the what now?") but this is our livelihoods* (*the kind of livelihood that doesn't pay you a cent) you are playing with! For shame!
　
The proof is in the butty, friends. In the last few weeks, Toronto FC has dispatched hundreds of unused "Junior CheeseBurgos" puns with the unceremonious dumping of Efrain Burgos Jr. They followed that up by "loaning" Joao Plata back to LDU Quito... you know, after pretending Ecuador was make-believe for two weeks. So many "tiny", "short" and "Los Webster" headlines... gone. Then yesterday, the final insult, the release of Nick Soolsma - a man we built an industry out of based on his genuine love for his cat "Suarez". Seriously, let's not even get into the goldmine that was Aron Winter. It's nameism we tell you!
　
Think we are just being paranoid? Explain to us how these finely crafted pun-machines were let go without a whimper yet Miguel "Ace is all we've got" Aceval and Ty "Try Harder" Harden are still here?! Those are such lame headline makers! You may laugh as our ratings tumble at the hands of TFC but don't come crying to us when Reggie Lambe and Dicoy Williams are released next week! Maybe an act of good faith, like signing Italian trialist Alberto "The Gelato" Giuliatto could prove us wrong - but we're sure The Reds are up to no good! You can bet Yourassowsky!

THE STARTING 11: Ways Joao Plata spent the Canada Day Long Weekend

"See you guys in six months... or not... who really knows?"



As of this moment, the status of Joao Plata is still in a state of "he said/ Quito said/ TFC said nothing/ Mariner yelled". Since Plata retweeted a message Friday evening claiming confirmation that he was returning to his native Ecuador, there has been a flurry of denials, rumours and malarkey surrounding the pint-sized favourite. If you want to predict the future based on manager Paul Mariner's post-game reaction to Plata's public posturing, you could fairly guess that we may have seen the last of "El MosQuito" in TFC red. Thus, with departure imminent, what better time for Plata to spend some final moments in Toronto than on a National holiday weekend...
　
11. Met up with some Canadian girls on Twitter - prematurely retweeted
　
10. Tearfully watched video of highlights of his goal celebration dances with Maicon Santos in slow motion to the Dirty Dancing hit "(I've Had) The Time of my Life"
　
9.Went out for a drink with Miguel Aceval on Friday night. Woke up Sunday afternoon... in Thunder Bay
　
8. Spent four hours with an English-Spanish dictionary and his contract trying to figure out what club he actually plays for
　
7. Stocked up at Gap Kids
　
6. Finally finished a whole TimBit all on his own
　
5. Said a long, tearful, face-to-face goodbye with Adrian Cann's abs
　
4. Spent the day at Canada's Wonderland desperately searching for a ride he was "This Tall To Ride"
　
3. Finally played some Canadian table hockey. Made 23 saves in net
　
2. Successfully climbed all of the stairs up to the CN Tower's lobby for charity
　
1. Somehow, managed to make MLSE look even MORE incompetent

Short tenure for tiny favourite as Joao Plata heading home

Adios tiny amigo?

What began as whispers a couple of weeks back was last night retweeted by the player in question, then backed by numerous sources - TFC's Joao Plata may be heading back to his parent club, Ecuador’s LDU Quito. Of course in true Toronto FC fashion this is about the clearest point of the transaction so far.

Many Reds supporters can be forgiven for thinking that the post-season hoopla surrounding Joao Plata meant that TFC was now the wee winger's parent club. However, reports indicate that LDU Quito were in fact the ones with the rights to recall Plata at this time and that the astronomically high fee (well, MLS astronomical) spent by TFC was simply to extend Plata's existing loan to MLS. On the other hand, the current proposed move is also being dubbed a "six month loan" to Quito with the suggestion that Plata returns to Toronto in the off-season. It is as clear as mud but stinks of an absolute managerial cock-up by TFC being quietly papered over. The club can't fault supporters for thinking this way when they operate with more secrets that The Stonecutters. (Don't mention Steve Guttenberg to Anselmi)

While Joao Jimmy Plata is an endearing character who became an instant fan favourite, his departure would not make a noticeable dent on the squad. His local fame has much more to do with his stature and short bursts of speed and (over) creativity than do his prospects. Despite his affable nature, Plata has been "found out" in MLS this season. Where his sideshow height and speed shocked some clubs last season, he was simply manhandled this year and pushed out of plays. He has become far too dependant on trying to take an extra step when dribbling and seems gun-shy at shooting on goal. A wonderful storybook player, but more of a bright spark in a dark time than a long-term MLS forward. At least at this point in his development.

We will link to any official word from the secret society that is Toronto FC below that isn't about Efrain Burgos Jr's release (with accompanied sad-face picture). In other news, the Ecuadorian version of "Webster" was greenlighted for production.

Yorkies Cards 2011 - Pack 5

When plotting these cards out, we opted for a heavy TFC slant (obviously) and because I wanted to use those mock logos here, we went with at least one player from every team in the league. Some favouritism was shown for ex-TFC players because to be honest, I don't know crap about Colorado's players short of Marvell Wynne. Also included was hair guru Brek Shea and the biggest little man on the pitch anywhere, Joao Plata.

Download Pack 5 [PDF]

Big deal for wee man

A three-year deal Joao?



"El MosQuito" will be buzzing around BMO Field for the foreseeable future as Toronto FC announced today that Joao Plata has signed a multi-year deal with the club. The dynamic yet diminutive Ecuadorian was often the only bright spark in a miserable first half of 2011 and his re-signing was considered as an off-season must in most supporters' eyes.
　
As per the secretive world of MLS contracts "terms of the deal were not disclosed" so it is yet to be determined if this deal is a full buyout of Plata's contract with original club LDU Quito, or, as reported in many circles, some type of co-ownership deal. Surely the details will emerge soon but for now, most TFC supporters will feel happy, and relieved, that a player who is considered to be an integral part of the club's future will remain in Toronto.
　
Of course, to stay on track after a breakout 2011, Plata will need to keep working hard to avoid any sophomore slump in a league where he will no longer be a surprise. Expectations will also be higher for Platita from fans and coaches alike in 2012 and how he handles such pressures will be the difference between success and failure. One thing that Plata did show in his first year that will surely help is a supreme confidence in his own abilities.
　
A deal not announced but one that is being anticipated with equally bated breath is for similar 2011 loanee Richard Eckersley. There is no shortage of goodwill between the player and the club but many feel that the defender's parent club Burnley will play financial hardball until the end of the European transfer window. Some defensive cover may indeed be on its way however as rumours that Chilean wingback Miguel Aceval is on the verge of joining The Reds are heating further today. With the MLS SuperDraft a mere day away, TFC 2012 is slowly taking shape.

THE STARTING 11: New Joao Plata nicknames

Mr. Platadopolous is hilarious!



For a fanbase that has had little to cheer about over four years, a little treat is well-deserved. And we do mean little. At a generously listed 5 Foot 3, Ecuadorian whiz-bang Joao Plata has stutter-stepped his way quickly into Reds supporters' hearts with his skilful play and "against all odds" attitude. Plus, he's just so cute and adorable! The current MLS Player of the Week, who came to Toronto as a late SuperDraft gamble, arrived with the nickname "La Platita" (Little Silver) but we just wouldn't be doing our jobs if we didn't offer up these new monikers for your consideration...
　
11. Jwow Plata
　
10. El MosQuito
　
9. Grandes Piquenos (aka Biggie Smalls)
　
8. Joaopoleon Dynamite
　
7. Elfcuador
　
6. Joaoggsy Bogues
　
5. The $9 Pint
　
4. Fivethreedinho
　
3. Half A Man - Half Amazing
　
2. Santos' Little Helper
　
1. Los Webster