AFTER 90 - Bradley returns but still go down swingin'

FC Dallas - 2
Hedges 37'
Pérez 88'
Toronto - 1
Nakajima-Farran 21'

WHAT WE EXPECTED: Depending on who showed up healthy, the range went from 'planning the Cup parade' to 'gonna take a whuppin'.  
WHAT WE GOT: The counter-attack stylings that we've come to expect with the welcomed addition of Bradley and Osorio, but it was just not enough.

THE GOOD:
- Nakajima-Farran's goal.  Not spectacular, but stayed composed to do the business.
- Counter attack was working, for what it's worth.
- Jackson made himself available throughout the match.

THE BAD:
- Crosses ultimately did them in.  Giving them up with 12 corners was rough, but pelting the net with them with little comprehensive defending to it was what did them in.
- Julio Cesar could only do so much.
- Gilberto was invisible for too long, as was Bekker.

THE MALARKEY:
- As much as it's awesome to wear reds on the road, why did Dallas wear their alts at home? I blame marketing and merchandising departments.
- Don'tcha hate it when the other team subs in their big gun and he scores in the 88th minute?

THE YORKIES' TFC NON-BRADLEY MAN OF THE MATCH: Nakajima-Farran

I had this stuck in my head during the entire report, so I should share it.

THE MATCHUP: Who shot J.D.'s hamstring?

Dallas down to ten...

FC DALLAS VS. TORONTO FC
TOYOTA STADIUM - SATURDAY 8:30PM ET
TV: SPORTSNET ONE

WHY SHOULD I WATCH THIS?
- Will TFC manage to find 11 healthy starters?
- Has FC Dallas flattered to deceive so far in 2014?
- Will Fran O'Leary end up watching the match from a distance while being taunted by FCD mascot Tex Hooper a la Bob de Klerk?
- Can Gilberto finally open his scoring account? (Again)
- Was the first month of TFC's season just a dream and we're all standing collectively in a shower?

MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME:
"El Burning Sensation"

THE DUEL:
David Texeira vs. Gilberto

WHO ARE YA?
Easter is a special occasion down in Texas and the owners of FC Dallas spare no expense to attract a few needed extra fans to Toyota Stadium with the allure of holiday treats. However, where other grounds may opt for a traditional chocolate egg hunt, FC Dallas embraces their Texan heritage and invites families to a Lone Star Easter.

Children dressed as Walker, Texas Ranger are lined up with a Junior High-Powered Assault Rifle while bunnies, force-fed on T-Bone steaks for a month, are released on the pitch and hunted down by freedom-loving toddlers. The child with the most bunnies after 90 minutes must then eat a BBQ'd 8-pound steak-filled bunny and a gallon of cheese balls to win a chocolate egg.

WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS:

 

ON THIS DAY IN TFC HISTORY:
APRIL 19, 2012: Danny Koevermans tore his meniscus on a Cadbury Creme Egg.

TFC trade for Jackson. What to write?... What... to... write?...

Jackson... during spell at Fulham.



WARNING: This is "Bad"

Firstly, a hearty Bloggers Union thanks to Tim Bezbatchenko and the gang for re-stocking the pun shelves in the TFC larder. Man cannot live on Lambe alone.

"Shamone!" The MLS trade window had barely creaked open before T-Bez decided he "Wanna Be Startin' Something". As is the annual off-season tradition round these parts, TFC swung a deal with FC Dallas, ("Remember the Time" with Hassli, de Guzman etc?) this time landing Brazilian midfielder/defender Jackson. Crotch grab!

Wanting to disprove to fans early that "They Don't Care About Us", The Reds swapped a conditional 2015 2nd Round SuperDraft Pick and some of that jumbo pile of allocation money they have. It's in the BMO Field closet next to the Elephant Man's bones and Macaulay Culkin. "You Are Not Alone" in thinking this isn't a "Thrilller" of a trade but Jackson is actually a very MLS-competent player with just under 100 appearances to his name in the league. And they got him for peanuts. Moonwalk!

Whether the 25-year old Jackson turns out to be a starter or at worst high-quality depth, it is a positive to see TFC making sober moves so early in the window. Now we must just implore T-Bez and the gang... "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough"!

In other non-Jackson news today, unconfirmed word is that Robert Earnshaw has declined TFC's offer to re-sign and plans to "Beat It" to another MLS side. Surely some club is looking for a striker who hibernates between May and September. "Shamone!"
　

And... We planned to have a little dance but couldn't think of an artist to feature. Oh well, Earnshaw is Welsh and so is this macho piece of rarebit...

THE SOUTH STAND REPORT : Toronto v. Dallas... or Don't Call It A Comeback!

 Dallastasaray.

Damn it's colder here than I thought it would be. Welcome to game five of Toronto's season.  Seriously I could've used some mitts. Bloody lake effects. 5 degrees my ass. 

Dallas is one of the hottest teams in the league leading the West.  Conversely, my fingers are like icicles.  We've bitched about not having a roof in the south end, but what would it take for some under-seat heating?  It's like third world here.

Sorry, I get cranky when I'm not prepared for the weather.

Starting XI:

Bendik

Russell - Agbossoumonde - O'Dea - Eckersley

Bostock - Hall - Osorio - Lambe

Ephraim

Earnshaw

Onto the match...

14' - YELLOW - Osorio goes into the book, for a tackle down on the wing.  It looked 50/50 but it was on the far side of the pitch from us

34' - GOAL - from a free kick punted in, the 5 outfielders and the keeper couldn't get to the ball, but the header ends up a the feet of Jacobson and buries it.
ROBINS 0, DALLASTASARAY 1

45' - YELLOW - Ephraim goes into the book for dissent... or just complaining.

Half-Time : Hypothermic.  Seriously, it's bad that it's cold, it's worse when your pen doesn't want to work.

45' - SUB - Osorio comes off for Silva.

52' - YELLOW - Silva makes friends with the ref's book by a tackling someone kinda sorta from behind.

60' - GOAL - This one is fantastic... Bendik saves, thrown to Bostock, given up in midfield and launched up the pitch, one bounce, Perez slams it in.

ROBINS 0, DALLASTASARAY 2

62' - Free kick over the top and Earnshaw nearly jumping snap kicks the ball in, but the Dallas keeper was right in front of it.

73' - SUB - Bostock comes out and Braun joins the fray.

77' - Some of the masses begin to flock out of the stadium...

84' - GOAL - Cross comes into the box, Hedges heads it over his keeper and Braun at the doorstep to head it in.  This... naw... could they... naw, it's too cold or something...
ROBINS 1, DALLASTASARAY 2

85' - O'Dea is in the box with his back to goal, ball at his feet, gets hauled down, and there doesn't seem to be an official with a clue on how to call it other than "play on"...

87' - Free kick delivered by Silva gets headed in by Russell, which ends up at the foot of O'Dea who goes for a cheeky side-foot redirection and forcing a great save from Fernandez.  These frozen buggers are really going for it...

90' - GOAL - Russell.  Screamer.  Top left corner.  Highlight reel.  Holy shit.  It's happening!!!!
ROBINS 2, DALLASTASARAY 2

4 minutes of extra time

90+1' - SUB - Eckersley, who was absolutely everywhere, is injured and makes way for Ashtone Morgan.

90+3' - YELLOW - Braun for colliding with a player on a 50/50 ball.

Full Time : TORONTO 2, DALLAS 2

Man of the Match : Ecks.   Please don't be too hurt sir.

Goat of the Game : Ephraim was absolutely abysmal.  When our new Argentinian friend arrives, you will become a spectator.  When Koevermans comes back, you will be returned to QPR.

Ref Rating : 2 out of 5.  Dallas can't blame them for Toronto coming back as they did their best to prevent them from playing well or fair at all.

I Am Not The Gaffer But... : How long does Ephraim need?  At least Bostock was taken out after his howler of a turnover which led to the second, albeit pretty and somewhat unlikely, goal.  Ephraim looks frightened when he's outfield and when he does have the ball, it's not the most confident.  He looks bullied and almost out of his depth.  Perhaps there's a metric that I don't see or understand (because I am not the gaffer...) but short of being his friend, it's difficult to comprehend what Nelsen sees in him that most others don't.  Bostock should be delivering more in his role and with his pedigree.  Perhaps they underestimate their opponents or the calibre of the league, but if their resume is to be a measure, they need to play much better than this.  I still don't feel Russell is a defender, and that rocket was something special.  He should be playing further up the pitch.  Agbossoumonde's first touch was suspect, but found his rhythm and was a solid centre back filling in for the ailing Danny Califf.  Would prefer to see Braun play instead of Ephraim next game, if only for what he brought to the last match.  Osorio was rewarded for such play last week...

Who else's fingers are still a little numb?  I'm writing this hours after the match and I feel like I need some form of handwear... announced crowd of just over 16,000.  On one hand, that's sad.  On the other hand, it's still better than what Columbus gets... All those people who left early made watching the two goals easier to watch.  Please leave earlier sooner... Hall wasn't as useless a MF as I called the MF earlier this week.  He wasn't great, but functional... Dallas keeper Fernandez had not one but two absolutely brutal clearances.  Neither one was under much pressure and neither one stayed in play... Ou est Hassli?... As an amateur vexillologist, the Swiss flag in the south end perplexes me because it is incorrect.  The flag they have is rectangular, while the proper flag is perfectly square... I may be crazy, but I think TFC is really trying to shoehorn the falcon as part of the club's branding.  The whole 'thing' of Bitchy flying through the tunnel and staying on her perch, though a cute pet trick, feels forced.  If there is a bird-like mascot within 3 years, know that I'm not psychic.

Player Ratings : Bendik 6, Russell 6.5, Agbossoumonde 6, O'Dea 6.5, Eckersley 7.5 [Morgan N/A], Bostock 5.5 [Braun 6.5], Hall 6, Osorio 5.5 [Silva 6.5], Lambe 6, Ephraim 5.5, Earnshaw 6

THE MATCHUP: "Visit a last place team and let them freeze in the cold"

The future home of Harry Redknapp

TORONTO VS. DALLAS
　
BMO FIELD - SATURDAY 4PM ET
TV: TSN 2
　
THE KICKABOUT:
Like some kind of Texan version of Oliver the Jeweller, FC Dallas is the club that buys our old, unwanted designated players. Oh yeeee-ahhhh! First it was Julian de Guzman for something to do with modern eras then most recently snapping up "Les Miserable" himself, Eric Hassli. The story of this match will of course be the return of said Frenchman who is now part of Queen's Park Texas Rangers' lethal/slow-motion strike duo alongside Kenny Cooper.
　
A note to Danny Koevermans for later this year - horizontal hoops are not slimming.
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME:
"The Designated Exchanger"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
TORONTO: John Bostock, Hogan Ephraim, Darren O'Dea
DALLAS: Kenny Cooper, David Ferreira, Eric Hassli
　
THE ODDS:
- Eric Hassli scoring the FIFA Goal of the Year: 10-1
- Eric Hassli and Kenny Cooper breaking the 3km/h barrier: 25-1
- Ryan Nelsen getting nostalgic when he sees Dallas' hoops kits: 100-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
Many in Toronto will think of FC Dallas as simply the team where we send expensive talent when they are deemed surplus here. However, it isn't only DP's that The Hoops have recycled off of TFC. The storage room under FC Dallas Stadium now boasts a set of phones that only dial a single agent's number, ten brand new five-year-planner diary books, a box of hilarious gag t-shirts that say "TFC Scouting Department 2007-2012", a giant tub of Butty Butter (TM) and some orange Lamborghini wax.
　
POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "HASSLI'S WIFE PLEASED WITH RESULT"

Fait accompli... Hassli deal confirmed

Time to bite a new badge monsieur



The worst kept secret in MLS is officially out. As was pretty much announced over Twitter on Friday evening by FC Dallas, the Texan side has grabbed Eric Hassli from Toronto FC for a conditional 2nd Round Draft Pick in 2014. While that doesn't quite make up for the short-sighted gifting of TFC's 1st Round Pick to Vancouver in the first place, it sounds possible that Toronto could get a better deal if Hassli plays well in Dallas. "If Eric has a productive year for Dallas the consideration paid to us will be greater" said TFC President Kevin Payne but as in all MLS deals - the details, including who eats what salary, are shrouded in a cloak of secrecy.
　
The deal will polarize some in TFC supporting world along the same lines as those pro-Payne and pro-Mariner but the return on the trade isn't the main factor going forward. The pick in return is a side dish for what Kevin Payne truly sought - flexibility with salaries in 2013 and the shedding of a DP contract with the remaining ability to shed one more if desired. The deal of course was not a one-sided affair as the player himself made it clear that he no longer wanted to be in Toronto. This one may go down as mutually beneficial.
　
Now that the Hassli book is closed and all of the "thanks for your contributions" have been delivered, the real test for Kevin Payne, as well as the glare from supporters, begins in earnest. As of this moment, Justin Braun is the only professionally experienced striker on the squad - and that is not a good situation. With camp underway and less than a month to go before the season begins, Payne must deliver on attacking additions, both midfield and forward, and deliver very quickly if he doesn't want to sabotage his new manager's early career.

THE STARTING 11: Reasons why Eric Hassli's trade to FC Dallas was delayed

Order your FC Dallas 2013 away kit now!



The worst-kept transfer secret in MLS is still a secret (EDIT: Yes we know now - see above. Thanks a lot official confirmation timing)... despite official Twitter releases and interviews on Major League Soccer's official website. At press time (yes, I referred to this site as "press". My mum made me a card that says 'PRESS' on it which I stuck in a Joey Jeremiah fedora... and I can do a mean 1930's newsie voice... "see?") no official confirmation has been released but it seems 99.9% sure that Eric Hassli is on his way to FC Dallas. Now most of us are used to MLS' taking 3-8 weeks to approve a deal that doesn't involve New York or Los Angeles but this one is getting silly. What is taking so long to cross those "i's" and dot those "t's"? "It's off the trolley I tells ya!"
　
11. Hassli requesting that all of Brek Shea's leftover hairstyling products be moved to his new locker upon arrival
　
10. The Greater Dallas Area Tattoo Association needs a week to stock up on ink
　
9. Hassli and wife waiting to see how the new "Dallas" handles the passing of Larry "JR" Hagman before agreeing on deal
　
8. Waiting for confidante Paul Mariner's Dallas-bound DP blessing to go" bask in the sun on a playoff-bound team"
　
7. Demanding a 1960's Citroen 2CV as company car
　
6. Kevin Payne and Schellas Hyndman meeting in a Texan honky tonk bar for "Over The Top" style arm wrestling face-off for cap room
　
5. FC Dallas mascot Tex Hooper needs time to work on hilarious new Parisian mime routine
　
4. Negotiating lucrative "Circus Shot Bonus"
　
3. FC Dallas yet to agree on changing kit to stereotypical Frenchman black-and-white hoops
　
2. Hassli demanding that Dallas defender George John legally changes his name to Jean-Georges
　
1. FC Dallas wants exclusive rights to all future ill-advised Toronto FC DP signings

Quelle surprise! Hassli pour The Hoops?

Ah, the Frisco nightlife would suit the L'Hassli

Either this deal is done or the FC Dallas' front office will be getting emails RE: Tampering very soon. Earlier this evening, courtesy of the Queen's Park Texas Rangers Twitter account, this little nugget was dropped...

NEWS: #FCDallas is in talks with Toronto FC and close to finalizing a deal to bring Eric Hassli to Dallas.
— FC Dallas (@FCDallas) February 1, 2013

The rumours about Eric Hassli's tres miserables feelings (and his wife's geography concerns) since Paul Mariner's dismissal from TFC have been rampant but few saw this possibility coming. If the tweet is to believed (and it kind of has to be) then FC Dallas has once again become the place where TFC sends its DP's that were bought without thinking. Hassli, he of the lumbering trot and numerous attempts at circus shots, clearly does not want to continue in Toronto and you get the vibe from Kevin Payne that the feeling is very, very mutual.

The fact that Hassli looks likely to move is no shock. This despite his heart-warming answer when asked on TFC Media Day if he is happy in Toronto - his reply "...................... (pause for dramatic Gallic effect) .................. yeah." Tres bien monsieur! No the shock will be if TFC can get away with getting anything in return and not having to eat too much of his bloated and short-sightedly renewed contract.

For Kevin Payne and the club going forward, Hassli's departure would aid them greatly simply in salary flexibility and an open international slot not to mention still allowing them the ability to cut a remaining DP. Yes, in the end giving away a (likely high) 1st Round Pick to our "pals" in Vancouver for a few underwhelming appearances will hurt but it's too late to cry over bone-headed milk. In the road forward, it is just another casualty in a desperately needed cull.

More news when anything become l'official.... or that kid who runs the FC Dallas Twitter account gets jumpy again...



de Guzman de gone to FC de Allas

No need to hitchhike Jules - you've got a Lambo!



Much maligned by some, to be missed by others, TFC's first-ever Designated Player and Scarborough native Julian de Guzman has been traded to FC Dallas. In a move that is quite obviously a salary dump, The Reds receive Andrew Wiederman in return. Wiederman is a 22-year old midfielder/winger with Generation Adidas status who has yet to see significant playing time in MLS.
　
The long-term litmus test on today's deal will of course be what Toronto FC does with what Paul Mariner claims "gives us increased flexibility to address areas where we have more pressing needs and opens up a designated player spot for our club," The pressure will be on Mariner and Co. to make a series of moves that indeed plugs the gaping holes on TFC while addressing the lust in many circles to add a marquee name. While dumping de Guzman will satisfy some fans who never held any affection for the player, that goodwill will wear off in a hurry if the club falls into its usual state of inaction.
　
A BRIEF TIMELINE OF THE DE GUZMAN DEAL RUMOURS:
July 12, 2012
8PM: First rumours of Julian de Guzman departing Toronto
8:30PM: Texas Lamborghini dealers get odd text messages
9PM: FC Dallas emerge as destination for de Guzman
9:30PM: Wrexham upset that rumours of them getting Wales' second de Guzman in a week would not come true
10PM: Whispers that Canadian international defender Kevin McKenna may be on his way to TFC
10:30PM: Whispers that TFC may be receiving Tony Tchani, Danleigh Borman and Andy Iro in return for de Guzman
July 13, 2012
1AM: Rick Titus unable to sleep with sudden TFC job openings. Stares at beeper for an hour
2AM: de Guzman's agent confirms that trade to Dallas is for realsies
4AM: With a DP slot open - TFC consider Messi.
4:02AM: CORRECTION: "TFC considered messy"
6AM: Earlier Kevin McKenna to TFC rumour actually "Paul Mariner to send Jim Brennan out to get McDonald's." Mariner loves him some Hot Cakes & Sausage. FACT.
7AM: Still not a peep from Rick Titus' beeper
9AM: Rangers dropped to Scottish Third Division. Why has TFC not sent a rescue helicopter for Maurice Edu yet?
10AM: Official trade confirmations coming in (here)... And scene....
10:45AM: Rick Titus unhappy. Hot Cakes & Sausage finished.

AFTER 90: Reds' claim Independence Day point - Texas handed over to the British

"You can keep New England but we're taking the Tex-Mex!"

THE BUZZ:
Can TFC's unbeaten streak continue?

Could The Reds win two consecutive away matches... since forever?

Have we seen the last of Joao Plata?

Are there connecting flights from Dallas to Quito?

Will Danny Koevermans provide the fireworks again?

Does Club Escobar have a Frisco location?

Is it illegal in Texas for a Canadian team to win on the Fourth of July?

FIRST HALF:

5' - GOAL: Dallas - Zach Loyd

DALLAS 1 - TORONTO 0

31' - GOAL: Toronto - Danny Koevermans

DALLAS 1 - TORONTO 1

37' - YELLOW CARD: Richard Eckersley

43' - YELLOW CARD: Ryan Johnson

FIRST HALF HIGHLIGHT: Koef "Settling the Catan" with a deft flick

FIRST HALF LOWLIGHT: 45 minutes of Independence Day and no alien invasion

HALFTIME: DALLAS 1 - TORONTO 1

SECOND HALF:

68' - SUB: Luis Silva on for Eric Avila

80' - YELLOW CARD: Torsten Frings

81' - SUB: Julian de Guzman on for Terry Dunfield

88' - SUB: Nick Soolsma on for Danny Koevermans

SECOND HALF HIGHLIGHT: Torsten Frings emasculating Brek Shea

SECOND HALF LOWLIGHT: 90 minutes... still no aliens. Not even a Randy Quaid sighting

FULL TIME: DALLAS 1 - TORONTO 1

PLAYER RATINGS: Milos Kocic 6 / Jeremy Hall 5.5 / Richard Eckersley 6 / Logan Emory 6.5 / Ashtone Morgan 6.5 / Reggie Lambe 6.5 / Terry Dunfield 6.5 (Julian de Guzman N/A ) / Torsten Frings 6.5 / Eric Avila 5.5 (Luis Silva 5 ) / Danny Koevermans 7 (Nick Soolsma N/A) / Ryan Johnson 5.5

THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Danny Koevermans

THE MOOD:

There is no way to be honestly disappointed by an away draw, in oppressive heat on a national holiday but we can't help but wish for more. And that is a good thing. It is a good feeling to wish for a bit more tonight as TFC probably deserved more. Despite giving up yet another early goal, The Reds again managed to tie the match (through the on fire Koevermans) and ended up bossing much of the second half. An unbeaten streak intact, a young defence playing a bit over their heads and a full squad that looks like it is always fighting. If any of the much whispered reinforcements are indeed on their way, Paul Mariner's Reds may yet deliver us Independence from the oppressive tyranny of The British five-year plans. Playoffs? No. Respect? Possibly.

THE MATCHUP: Burn on the Fourth of July

That Burns the eyes worse than a firecracker



DALLAS VS. TORONTO
　
FC DALLAS STADIUM - WEDNESDAY 9PM ET
TV: TSN
　
THE KICKABOUT:
Nothing bad can happen in Texas right? Pow! Pow! Kaboom! That will either be the noise of post-match Independence Day fireworks at FC Dallas Stadium or the Texas Rangers (law enforcement version not baseball version) catching up to Miguel Aceval. Yes, TFC makes its first return to The Lone Star State since "The TFC Three" made a mess of Houston's Club Escobar. While no further illegal activity is expected - team officials may be on the lookout for a 5 Foot 3 illegal emigrant.
　
Things on the pitch seem to have improved somewhat since The Reds blew that big lead against Houston a couple of weeks back and manager Paul Mariner claims that his side are "hard to beat". Recent results back up his statement and improved play by many in the squad, including MLS Player of the Week Danny Koevermans, gives supporters hope against fellow strugglers FC "Don't Call Us Burn" Dallas. However, with the transfer window open and a host of rumours imagining players coming and going - The MarinEra is still very much a work in progress.
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "El Fireworko"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
FC DALLAS: Jair Benitez, David Ferreira, Brek Shea
TORONTO FC: Logan Emory, Danny Koevermans, Ashtone Morgan
　
THE ODDS:
- Night ending with Luis Silva running from cops: 5-1
- Joao Plata making a run for the border: 10-1
- In true "Dallas" fashion - Toronto FC's last four matches turn out to be a dream sequence: 25-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
This match may be regarded as one of the all-time MLS patriotic matches. The foreign TFC visiting (of all places) Dallas, Texas on the Fourth of July - America's holiest of holy days. And a pyrotechnic extravaganzo! The fixture of course has a long way to go to best FIFA'a All-Time Most Patriotic match though as that title still goes to the 1947 West Ham United vs. Hertha Berlin friendly at Upton Park. Down 2-0 to the visiting Germans at the half, The Hammers shocked the football world by subbing in 72 year-old former Prime Minister Winston Churchill. Despite his age and portly posture, the old bulldog bossed the midfield and ended the match with a hat trick which saw the London side see off the Berliners 3-2.
　
POST-MATCH HEADLINE: "REDS' ROCKETS DO GLARE; BREAK SHEA CLAIMS IT'S UNFAIR; 1-0 TFC - GOOD THING TEXANS DON'T CARE"

Churchill pops his second past the Hertha keeper

LETTERS FROM CAMP: "Can we play you, can we play you, can we play you every week?"

Dallatasaray - Pride of Turkxas



It's the final group stage match at The Mickey Mouse Cup for Toronto FC but also their first preseason match against a MLS club. Tonight's tilt sees The Reds face off against the team that gave TFC something to look forward to over winter - FC Dallas. As you remember, The Hoops folded like a cheap shirt in the final Champions League Group Stage match last autumn, paving the way for TFC to head to the quarterfinals against Davy Knickers and The Boyz at SkyDome next week. The least The Reds could do is let Dallas have first place at Disney. With that in mind... Ty harden starts tonight... to the pitch for equally useful highlights!

- Mickey Mouse delivers the game ball to the refs in what appears to be a Sheffield Wednesday kit. Who knew Mickey ups The Owls?
1' - Reds go for the "Triangle" offence by opting for Reggie Lambe over Ryan Johnson just before kick-off
7' - Unfair advantage for FC Dallas - warm weather and a stadium with less than 300 people in attendance... exactly like mid-season at Pizza Hut Park
12' - Bob de Klerk insanely yelling instructions at Ty Harden before a Dallas set piece. The X-Rated pictures Harden must have of TFC management must be damning. No other explanation.
19' - Nothing but love for Milos Kocic but Stefan Frei is undoubtedly the # 1
21' - After 20 minutes Joao Plata offers the first hint of TFC offence. Disjointed.
26' - Reggie Lambe makes his first good run in 3 matches. Still undercooked.
32' - By no means have TFC been pretty but the mlssoccer.com announcers would have nicer things to say about the Hitler Select XI at the Mussolini Testimonial Match
35' - Out of absolutely nothing Luis Silva goes Route 1 and plows through FC Dallas' defence and pushes the ball past The Hoops' keeper. TORONTO FC 1 - FC DALLAS 0
37' - Lambe gets chopped (thank you) by FCD keeper and deserves a PK but minor league ref gives him a yellow for diving instead. Sport Goofy officiating.
39' - Did "Master of The Draft" Mo Johnston pick Luis Silva? The rookie makes it two by pouncing on a loose ball and firing it into goal. TORONTO FC 2 - FC DALLAS 0
45' - Reds dominant after waking up in the last 15 minutes but need to bring that at 0:01 against Los Angeles

TORONTO FC 2 - FC DALLAS 0

48' - Miguel Aceval establishing himself as the anchor of TFC's central defence
52' - mlssoccer.com announcers trying to make nicknames for Luis Silva... umm do they not read us and Waking The Red? Helloooooo? "Silva Bullet"?
60' - Ashtone Morgan leaves the match for trialist Kevin Huezo. Morgan has been very solid in all three preseason matches
65' - TFC Academy director Thomas Rongen's finds of Kevin Huezo and Moises Orozco making decent arguments for full contracts
70' - Everybody out of the pool. Only Terry Dunfield remains from starting eleven.
78' - The kids are alright as TFC's youth grinding down FCD's youth
81' - After 5 years, Toronto FC may have finally found the key to making playoff rounds - always finish off by playing Dallas
83' - Ryan Johnson giving hope that TFC has two capable strikers with a calmly placed finish to put The Reds up by three. TORONTO FC 3 - FC DALLAS 0
88' - MLS announcers struggling to find something nice to say about TFC despite a 3-0 lead
90'- Promising signs after the first half hour as TFC now gets ready to play The Mickey Mouse Final on Saturday night against those pot smoking hippies - Vancouver Whitecaps

TORONTO FC 3 - FC DALLAS 0

A Mickey Mouse tournament after all!

Sweet pair of Hackens!

It is one of North America's most fiercely contested, rodent-related soccer tournaments in history. FIFA ranks it in the Top 250 theme park-based football competitions of the 21st Century. Yes, it's time to get off the teacups and take the monorail over to the Walt Disney World Pro Soccer Classic. Rolls right of the tongue.

　
In its third year of existence, the "Classic" once again invites a host of clubs for a preseason tournament in the Orlando sun with the winner leaving with untold riches. Well, at least a trophy with Sport Goofy and coupons for some funnel cakes. The tournament is also Toronto FC's only competitive preseason action so we thought we'd have a quick look at the teams our Reds will face. This should help while squinting your eyes at MLS's internet feed.
　
ORLANDO CITY - February 25th, 6PM
NICKNAME: The Lions
ALTERNATE NICKNAME: The Mouseketeers
STAR PLAYER: John "Wayne's Brother" Rooney
POSSIBLE FLORIDA TRIALIST: Anyone from Epcot's Brazil pavilion
CELEBRITY SUPPORTERS: Chip 'n Dale; Scrooge McDuck; Tony Orlando (Dawn pending)
BIO: The current USL Pro Division Champions (North America's 3rd Tier) had a tremendously successful and well attended first year in Orlando after moving from Austin, Texas. Already out-drawing Tampa Bay Mutiny and Miami Fusion combined, Orlando City are making a case for future MLS consideration... or a home for D.C. United to move to when their next four stadium proposals fail.
　
BK HACKEN - February 28th, 6PM
NICKNAME: The Hedge
ALTERNATE NICKNAME: The Meatballers
STAR PLAYER: Matias Ostberg
POSSIBLE FLORIDA TRIALIST: "Steve" from IKEA Orlando
CELEBRITY SUPPORTERS: 1/4 of ABBA; extras from the Thor movie; Volvo dealers
BIO: Finally a chance to use all those saved up Swedish puns! TFC's first ever Swedish opponents are Gothenburg’s BK Hacken of the Allsvenskan Division. Mostly known for having a logo that looks like it could be half-eaten meatballs or ample, resting breasts - Hacken will no doubt offer The Reds a European-style challenge. Also, a chance to throw that leftover IKEA allen key at your computer screen.
　
FC DALLAS - March 1st, 6PM
NICKNAME: The Hoops
ALTERNATE NICKNAME: Dallatasaray
STAR PLAYER: Brek Shea
POSSIBLE FLORIDA TRIALIST: Vidal Sassoon (on Shea's insistence)
CELEBRITY SUPPORTERS: Pizza The Hut; the three dudes in their supporters' section
BIO: Ah, our old friends from Texas. Really this should be a 90 minute "Thank You" to The Hoops for bending over so ably against us in the final Champions League Group Stage Match. If it wasn't for their apathetic showing this past fall we wouldn't all be going to SkyDome in a couple of weeks!

AFTER 90: Biggest. Victory. Ever.

The Rides of March



THE BUZZ:
For TFC supporters it felt as if this match was five years in the making. Half a decade of less than mediocre results and high drama off the pitch had the chance to be erased, even if only temporarily, if The Reds could grab a win tonight. Long suffering supporters would have the opportunity to see their success-starved club in the spotlight of the CONCACAF Champions League this March if Toronto could just eke out a victory in the less-than-rabid confines of FC Dallas' Pizza Hut Park. It would take devotion, discipline and heart if Aron Winter's rebuilt club were to restore a little bit of the TFC-fever that has been missing for far too long. A leap into future success on a grander stage... or another lacklustre TFC outing? 90 minutes like no other for The Reds.
　
FIRST HALF:
29' - GOAL: Toronto - Danny Koevermans
FC DALLAS 0 - TORONTO FC 0
'43 - YELLOW CARD: Andy Iro
　
FIRST HALF HIGHLIGHT: De Koef showing his worth... again
FIRST HALF LOWLIGHT: The droning horns of Pizza Hut Park's pathetic crowd
　
HALFTIME: FC DALLAS 0 - TORONTO FC 1
　
SECOND HALF:
58' - YELLOW CARD: Nick Soolsma
69' - GOAL: Toronto - Joao Plata
FC DALLAS 0 - TORONTO FC 2
77' - YELLOW CARD: Julian de Guzman
80' - SUB: Terry Dunfield for Julian de Guzman
81' - GOAL: Toronto - Joao Plata
FC DALLAS 0 - TORONTO FC 3
86' - SUB: Peri Marosevic for Joao Plata
90'+ - SUB: Nathan Sturgis for Danny Koevermans
　
SECOND HALF HIGHLIGHT: Plata dancing away 5 years of cobwebs
SECOND HALF LOWLIGHT: Sour grapes we can hear from Vancouver
　
FULL TIME: FC DALLAS 0 - TORONTO FC 3
　
THE MOOD:
It just seemed so deserved. When you saw more fans at a single Toronto bar than seemingly the entire stadium in Dallas - it just seemed right. Sure Dallas could have won and moved on in Champions League, but who would have cared? In Toronto, where a die-hard fanbase has been so nearly beaten into submission, it was simply cathartic. For tonight at least, five long years of frustration washed away with the dancing of a pint-sized Ecuadorian. Best. Win. Ever. For so many reasons.
　
On the pitch, it should not be lost in the euphoria of such a major victory that this team has evolved. It may have taken a little longer than many expected, but Aron Winter's rebuild has started to change the face of Toronto FC. No they have yet to turn into Ajax Canada, but TFC are now a team that is capable of fighting, persevering and on the odd evening, making their supporters remember why they fell in love five years ago.
　
PLAYER RATINGS: Milos Kocic 7 / Doneil Henry 6 / Ty Harden 7 / Andy Iro 6 / Ashtone Morgan 6.5 / Torsten Frings 6.5 / Julian de Guzman 6.5 (Terry Dunfield - ) / Ryan Johnson 7 / Nick Soolsma 6 / Danny Koevermans 6.5 (Nathan Sturgis - ) / Joao Plata 7.5 (Peri Marosevic - )
　
THE YORKIES' TFC PLAYER OF THE MATCH: Joao Plata
TALKING POINT: Is it too early to wait at SkyDome for March? Discuss.

THE MATCHUP: Biggest. Match. Ever.

 

FC DALLAS (2ND) VS. TORONTO FC (3RD)
CONCACAF CHAMPIONS LEAGUE - GROUP C
　
PIZZA HUT PARK - TUESDAY 8PM EDT
TV: GOL TV -----RADIO: FAN 590
　
THE KICKABOUT:
Yes the hyperbole machine is once again churning out platitudes at full strength - but this time it's for realsies! TFC's penultimate match of 2011 is arguably the biggest in five years’ worth of variously less important fixtures. With a simple win, and only a win, The Reds can take an eraser to much of the malaise that 2011 has generated and propel themselves to their half-decade zenith.
　
The match is the truest test of how far Aron Winter's club has developed. Is it still the unpredictable club that failed to score on Dallas in a game-and-a-half during the tornado-stained home fixture? Or, is the "new" TFC the resilient, tougher version we saw against Philadelphia and New York? Only their best will see them past a good and equally spirited Dallas. With no major injuries, and a fairly rested First Team - their only excuse will be lack of heart.
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "The Stuffed Crust Conundrum"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
FC DALLAS: Daniel Cruz, Daniel Hernandez, Brek Shea
TORONTO FC: Torsten Frings, Ryan Johnson, Danny Koevermans
　
THE ODDS:
- Aron Winter's 2011 record forgotten in an instant if TFC qualify: 2-1
- Toronto winning... $59.99 "CHAMPIONS LEAGUE QUARTERFINALISTS" T-Shirts for sale at BMO Field by Saturday: 5-1
- Tauro FC managing to qualify at Toronto's expense; MLSE still crowing over a massive "TFC win": 20-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
By now, most supporters have grown used to hearing how this is TFC's "biggest match ever" but The Reds aren't the first Toronto footy squad to play in a massive fixture - their predecessors had their share of huge matches too:
- METROS-CROATIA fought off rebels to seize Zagreb's main bridge
- TORONTO LYNX survived a mauling by an actual lynx
- TORONTO SHOOTING STARS vs. The Decepticons (indoor)
- TORONTO BLIZZARD successfully sued Dairy Queen
- TORONTO CITY/G.I.JOE Selects vs. Cobra 11

THE WAGER: 0-0 Draw (2011: 23-22 with 7 exact scores)
FUTURE HEADLINE: "BIGGEST. FRUSTRATION. EVER."

Cobra 11 - what a midfield!

AFTER 90 (REPLAY): Lightning strikes twice as Reds lose to Dallas... again

Electrifying! Unlike TFC's offence.



IN THE TUNNEL:
Whatever god, deity or golden calf that MLSE sacrifices virgins to - really, really wants Toronto FC to become CONCACAF Champions. For the second time this year, Great Odin's Beard has caused the skies to turn upside down over BMO Field and wash away a 1-0 deficit in its biblical wake. The first time around, against Vancouver, us fans got to attend a make-up match weeks later but this time the match will be replayed at 10:15AM on a weekday.
　
It is great news for those who are paid to report on football and/or the terminally "alternatively" employed but for those of us not paid to report on the football men kicking their football goals (I know, you're shocked aren't you) we must follow via the wacky online world of social media and other internet machine gadgetry. Instead... today we decided to pretend that one of last night's thousands of lightning strikes hit The Yorkies' international headquarters and our report thus comes from a dimension where anything can be imagined... and coffee has yet to be digested.
　
ON THE PITCH:
1' - Literally 1's of supporters on hand with the match getting set to get underway. Three-man referee crew without two day’s worth of laundry have resorted to wearing a bathrobe, a rented Batman costume and a comedy hot dog outfit. Kick-off...
3' - Only major change to TFC line-up being exclusion of Terry Dunfield who decided to have the CNE Krispy Kreme hamburger for breakfast. Donuts and meat was a bad choice
10' - Concerns that FC Dallas' Brek Shea was hit by lightning last night diffused - his hair apparently always looks that way
13' - Peri Marosevic and Ryan Johnson putting pressure on Dallas keeper Kevin Hartman - first one to score gets a framed Def Leppard mirror
20' - Free admission to match at CNE means a heavy Carny presence in stands. Rubes are getting hustled this morning
27' - Gianluca Zavarise with a shot that bounces off the side of the Food Building, spins twice on a Crown & Anchor wheel, knocks a waffle ice cream out of a fat kid's hand and ends up in Kevin Hartman's hands. Furious action!
35' - Teams starting to look a bit winded. Replacing Gatorade with Deep Fried Cola not a bright idea
38' - YELLOW CARD: Torsten Frings decks Brek Shea. Give the German a stuffed toy unicorn
40' - Joao Plata pressuring Hartman's north end goal. Possibly being drawn by smell of Tiny Tom's Donuts... or genuine camaraderie with the height-challenged Donut mascot
45' - PENALTY: Richard Eckersley (YELLOW CARD) pulls down Marvin Chavez in the area. Daniel Hernandez takes the kick and... misses! Totally distracted by the smell from the Horse Building
45'+ - GOAL: MLSE forgot to give their god a peanut and FCD's Jack Stewart baffles Matt Stinson and slots the ball past Milos Kocic. Karma? Halftime whistle blown
　
HALFTIME: TORONTO 0 - DALLAS 1
　
46' - No changes for TFC. Halftime oranges replaced by pizza-on-a-stick - will it pay off?
50' - The MC from the Arctic Express ride standing in front row yelling "DO YOU WANNA GO FASTER?!!!" at Ty Harden
53' - SUB: Danleigh Borman out for Ashtone Morgan who just got off The Gravitron
56' - SUB: Gianluca Zavarise heads off to give debut to Leandre Griffit who sadly has to wolf down his first ever corn dog before running on pitch. No time to savour
67' - Sorry... was dreaming of the Better Living Building. Could have bought three Sham-Wows, a cheap leather belt and got a caricature of myself as an astronaut kicking a football past an alien resembling David Seaman. Still 1-0 eh?
71' - TFC looking more likely to win a midway ring-toss game than scoring a goal anytime soon
77' - Today's match being called "the greatest free entertainment at the CNE since Sha Na Na wrestled alligators live on stage at the bandshell back in 1987". God speed "Bowzer"... God speed.
80' - SUB: Matt Stinson out for Doneil Henry. Sure... why not?
82' - Where's a good tornado when you need one?
85' - TFC throwing the kitchen sink at Dallas. Ironically, kitchen sinks are on sale in the Better Living Building
88' - I need a deep fried vodka
89' - YELLOW CARD: Richard Eckersley acts petulantly and gets a 2nd Yellow for booting the ball into the stands which means... RED CARD. Dumb.
90'+ - Watching The Reds and the visiting the CNE had a lot in common today - you expect a day of fun but end up spending too much on food, getting a bit bored and leaving with a slight headache
　
FULL TIME: TORONTO 0 - DALLAS 1
　
IN THE BATHS:
While weather gods can do all kinds of magic, like giving you a second chance to prove you can't suck twice in a row, but at some point you have to do some work yourself. TFC, who came out flat last night (before the mini "End of Days") had every opportunity to reverse their CONCACAF Champions League fortunes today but could only respond with more of the same. Today's replay was such a gift for The Reds, one that could have put them in the Group C driver's seat, which makes their flat performance seem all the worse. The offence has once again fallen into sputter-mode and today's re-loss gifts FC Dallas a huge advantage in the group while putting TFC
　
PLAYER RATINGS: Milos Kocic 6.5 / Richard Eckersley 5 / Ty Harden 6 / Torsten Frings 6.5 / Danleigh Borman 6 (Ashtone Morgan 6 ) / Matt Stinson 5.5 (Doneil Henry - )/ Gianluca Zavarise 6.5 (Leandre Griffit 6 ) / Peri Marosevic 6.5 / Julian de Guzman 5.5 / Ryan Johnson 6 / Joao Plata 6
　
THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Peri Marosevic
TALKING POINT: TFC would have won a third match. Discuss.

THE MATCHUP: Deep in the heart of "Ex"as

Exhibition match



TORONTO (1st) VS. DALLAS (2nd)
CONCACAF CHAMPIONS LEAGUE - GROUP C
　
BMO FIELD - WEDNESDAY 8PM ET
TV: GOLTV
　
THE KICKABOUT:
- Was TFC's recent upswing a carny trick or is their form closer to the performance put on in Chicago last Sunday?
- Will The Reds' "Whack-A-Mole" defence manage to avenge the 1-0 loss when Dallas last played at BMO Field?
- Can a CNE walk-up crowd help the often anaemic attendance for Champions League matches?
- Does Milos Kocic's recent fine form see him continue in goal?
- How long can broadcasters hold off before using the phrase "carnival atmosphere"?
　
MANUFACTURED DERBY NAME: "The 'Ex'as Ranger"
　
PLAYERS TO WATCH:
TORONTO: Torsten Frings, Milos Kocic, Ryan Johnson
DALLAS: David Ferreira, Kevin Hartman, Brek Shea
　
THE ODDS:
- TFC forcing FC Dallas to use a CNE 'Hall of Mirrors as their dressing room: 20-1
- With the added CNE traffic, Toronto's notoriously late fans arriving at the match sometime around the 70th minute: 30-1
- Former Reds Ali Gerba and Collin Samuel holding an unofficial "autograph signing" in the Food Building: 50-1
　
WHO ARE YA?
- TFC apparently tried to have CONCACAF reschedule the match as they felt FC Callas would have an unfair advantage being surrounded by so much deep fried food
- Joao Plata has finally cashed in on his burgeoning fame as the new face for CNE favourite "Tiny Tom Donuts"
- BMO Field's regular announcer will be replaced by the MC from the "Arctic Express" midway ride who will constantly yell "Do ya wanna go faster?!" at Ty Harden
　
THE WAGER: 1-1 Draw (2011: 19-16 with 6 exact scores)
FUTURE HEADLINE: "REDS' ROLLER COASTER SEASON CONTINUES"

CONCACAF Geographic - The Travelling Supporter's Guide to: FC Dallas

Bobby Ewing: Good dream sequence, crappy airport



The Yorkies present "CONCACAF Geographic" - a three-part travel guide for those with the expendable funds, masochistic streak and strong stomach to tackle supporting Toronto FC away during the Champions League Group Stage. Our travel department has been hard at work to bring you this three-part bonus, non-pullout, section of The Yorkies. Pack your bags for Part 1 of 3...
　
WHAT TEAM AM I WATCHING?
First up, in an alphabetical sense, is FC DALLAS. The most familiar of TFC's three group stage amigos; we will have played the Texan MLS club four times by season's end. Known locally as "The Hoops", "Los Gringos de Futbol" or "We have a soccer team?" FCD are led by dynamic young midfielder Brek Shea as well as bovine club mascot Tex Hooper. Celebrity supporters include J.R. Ewing, death-row inmates and cattle.
　
WHERE AM I GOING?
Pizza Hut Park in the Dallas suburb of Frisco, Texas - the top-ranked pizza-themed football ground in mainland USA. Frisco, or "The Gateway to Obesity" as it is known in tourism circles, is one of the United States' friendliest yet most rotund suburbs. Founded in 1970 by the inventor of Frito-Lays, Frisco was meant to be an urban oasis designed on the shape of a ridged potato chip but is now mostly famous for the downtown Rodeo Clown Memorial and the State parole board's "Electrocution Wednesdays"
　
HOW DO I GET THERE?
There are regular flights from Toronto to Dallas-Fort Worth or you can attempt to grab a cargo flight into Frisco's new Bobby Ewing Non-International Airport. It is recommended to rent a 1970's Cadillac with longhorns attached to the hood during your stay as the only local public transportation includes chuck wagons and $3 piggybacks on the shoulders of illegal immigrants
　
WHAT SHOULD I TAKE WITH ME?
To paraphrase The Matrix - "You're gonna need guns. Lots of guns." Yes, in Texas, a sidearm is a way of life and in most major hotel chains you will be expected to "take down" your breakfast before it is deep fried for you. Chaps, a tool to add holes to your belt, a right-wing Christian agenda and knowledge of sauce are also recommended.
　
WHAT SHOULD I EAT & DRINK?
When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in Texas, take a defibrillator. Honestly, you can eat anything you like in Texas as most of it arrives deep fried, or, in the case of Tex-Mex, wrapped in a casing ending in "ita"... then deep fried. We recommend fasting for three days for every meal you plan on eating. And remember, when you order your eggs "scrambled" - that means scrambled with a burger and fries and wrapped in a pizza... then deep fried and served in a burrito... usually brought to your table in a bowl of chili.
　
WHAT SHOULD I LOOK OUT FOR?
While no more dangerous than your average American suburb (so actually, very dangerous) there are precautions to take in Frisco. Be sure to look into the sky regularly as guns shot into the air do tend to drop their bullets recklessly; If you take the Lord's name in vain... that's a shootin'; If you can't finish your steak... that's a shootin'; and if you besmirch the name of any Bush... that's a shootin'. Also... steer dung.
　
WHAT'S A HANDY PHRASE TO REMEMBER?
"Howdy y'all, I sure do like them there (pick one) shotguns/ chimichangas / Republicans / Hooters girls / anti-abortionists / hats / evolution debunkers." Follow this with two pistol shots in the air or into dirt.


Be sure to check back for our CONCACAF Geographic guides to Pumas UNAM and Tauro FC coming soon

Reds take shot of Avila as Maicon Santos heads to FC Dallas

"You new here? It's ok, so is everyone else"

And then there was one. Of all the players brought in under Preki, only Ty Harden (I know!) is still standing. The "TFC Transfer Window Wacky Funtime Hour" has continued today (official announcement) as club "captain" Maicon Santos was shipped to FC Dallas for former Generation Adidas attacking midfielder Eric Avila.
　
23-year old American Avila, is by all accounts a very versatile midfielder who fits into the Aron Winter modus operandi of being able to handle multiple positions. He also becomes the second once-highly-touted Dallas product TFC has acquired in a week after nabbing Peri Marosevic on a free. Unlike the sparsely used Marasovic, Avila has made 58 appearances with The Hoops but has fell out of FCD manager Schellas Hyndman's plans.
　
Maicon Santos will leave Toronto with mixed feelings behind. Many fans may miss some of the numbers he put up but many more will bemoan his enigmatic play. It was often frustrating to see the man many called "Mike Sanders" waste some obvious talents with play that was inconsistent and often bordering on lazy. Last month's match in Kansas City, where many blamed Santos for TFC's 1st half collapse (including Aron Winter who yanked him in the 43rd minute) was the death knell for the affable Brazilian's Toronto career. It was a performance that illuminated the worst of Santos' game which only got worse when attempts were made to force him into the midfield rather than up front.
　
TFC surely join a rare trivia group of clubs who have traded away two captains in one season. However, the armband will no doubt fall onto the much more "captainy" bicep of Torsten Frings who has been de-facto captain now for weeks. In other news, Ty Harden's suitcase is packed and ready to go.

AFTER 90: "First day of the rest of our lives" postponed until Saturday

Dallastasaray: No Turkish delight



IN THE TUNNEL:
Before the transfer window season started we commented that TFC better have new players arriving like clowns out of a tiny car. Well, Aron Winter bought a Fiat and the players have come pouring out - so much so that no less than five new faces would take to the pitch on a very steamy night at BMO Field. Would tonight indeed be the dawning of the "new TFC" or would it be business as usual at "The House That Mo Wrecked"?
　
ON THE PITCH:
1' - Torontonians still 30 minutes away from usual arrival for the match, thus emptyish yet excitable crowds await. Kick-off...
2' - Biggest new name Torsten Frings goes for instant legend status with a free kick that tests Dallas' GK Kevin Hartman
7' - Crowd seems to have a nervous yet positive energy
14' - FC Dallas have complete control of the match and are shutting down any TFC attack with incredible efficiency
15' - YELLOW CARD: Eddy Viator is the violator
25' - Sad lack of Fries + Onion Rings on hand
37' - Once optimistic crowd now shaking heads and collectively sighing as it has become obvious that the "new TFC" has yet to gel
44' - First and only real chance for The Reds sees a cross reach Danny Koevermans' ample skull but ball's height doesn't allow him to get enough power behind it
45' - End of half as temperature and TFC's play both remain humid
　
HALFTIME: TORONTO 0 - DALLAS 0
　
47' - Surely part of Aron Winter's infusion of character players won't allow for TFC's old early 2nd half letdown would it?...
48' - GOAL: Brek Shea could have raised cattle with the amount of property awarded to him by TFC's defence. Ty Harden and to a lesser extent Andy "Mr. 100" Iro were guilty as charged as Shea blasted a great (and unobstructed for miles) shot past Stefan Frei who looked like he was having Vietnam flashbacks when the ball passed him
TORONTO 0 - DALLAS 1
50' - Still yet to see unholy union of French Fry and Onion Ring. Disappointing.
52' - 90% of the stadium celebrates as Joao Plata seems to score the equalizer only for it to be called back controversially as offside
53' - SUB: Mikael Yourassowsky off for the equally enigmatic Maicon "Mike Sanders" Santos
55' - SUB: Nathan Sturgis off for the equally underwhelming Nick Soolsma
60' - The Goalblerone makes a massive save from a very unmarked Shea shot with Andy Iro clearing the subsequent rebound off the line. Solid.
62' - Kevin Hartman sees Frei's save and raises it with an equally big save from a Maicon Santos attempt
68' - Crowd downgraded from expectant to anxious to sweaty
70' - SUB: Plata makes way for Gianluca "I'm Still Here" Zavarise
76' - YELLOW CARD: The massive frame of Andy Iro was eventually going to get a caution. He is a big man.
86' - Santos gets a bit Brazilian and glances a header just wide of the Dallas goal
90' - The un-serviced Koevermans' has a chance to be an instant hero but a sharp cross gets tangled in his ankles - should have been an easy tap-in and equalizer
90'+ - Referee blows for full time as future still on hold
　
FULL TIME: TORONTO 0 - DALLAS 1
　
IN THE BATHS:
Perhaps it was all too much to expect a team that was nearly 50% new to gel that quickly. But, after 4 1/2 years and many false dawns you can't really blame the TFC faithful for hoping for better. It was a mixed bag for the new faces with Frings and Iro looking solid while Danny Koevermans was left isolated and Eddy Viator a touch nervy. Some of the "older" faces however contributed to the loss in much bigger ways. Awful nights for Danleigh Borman, Nathan Sturgis and Mikael Yourassowsky illuminated that while many changes have been made, more are in The Reds' future. It will take a while for TFC 2.0 to come together but for now the future has to wait until at least Saturday evening.
　
PLAYER RATINGS: Stefan Frei 6.5 / Eddy Viator 6 / Ty Harden 5.5 / Andy Iro 6.5 / Danleigh Borman 4.5 / Nathan Sturgis 5 (Nick Soolsma 5) / Torsten Frings 6.5 / Mikael Yourassowsky 5.5 (Maicon Santos 6) / Joao Plata 6 (Gianluca Zavarise 5) / Danny Koevermans 6 / Ryan Johnson 6
　
THE YORKIES' TFC MAN OF THE MATCH: Stefan Frei
TALKING POINT: How many "new beginnings" are you allowed in one season? Discuss.